推 JamesCaesar:Baltemar Britooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo 07/21 12:30
推 wei7515:XDDDDDDD,怎麼會有12個人在場上 :p 07/21 12:33
推 IronChef:hahah Portugal's most capped GK 07/21 14:04
HACKS DOWNED - BUT AT A COST
http://www.chelseafc.com/page/NewsHomePage/0,,10268~1076413,00.html
The UCLA sports fields have experienced some of the finest, if not the finest
football skills ever executed upon them these past two weeks during Chelsea's
training camp. But nothing could prepare them for what took place the
afternoon the Chelsea Backroom Staff took on the British Press XI.
過去兩周切爾西訓練營在 UCLA 讓當地人見識了最棒的足球技巧,
然而沒有人料到他們會看到切爾西工作人員與英國記者11人的對決。
To say the participants in this full-sided match were committed would be like
saying the sun is sometimes out in southern California, but despite the
highly-charged nature of the game, there were no significant injures
sustained - except one!
比賽很激烈, 但沒有什麼嚴重的受傷, 除了一個人...
Jose' Mourinho may not have the physical stature of a Petr Cech, but between
the posts was where he chose to play - for one afternoon only becoming the
Special 1, rather than the Special One.
魔力鳥也許體格不如切赫, 他在這個下午選擇站在門柱之間
從 speical one 變成 Special 1
As early as the fifth minute, the boss was racing across his area, that
legendary self-confidence on show as he favoured the punch, rather than the
catch in dealing with a high ball.
Before the first-half was out he had shown his mettle with a brave dive at
the feet of The Sun's Ian McGarry and he couldn't resist striding 80 yards to
become involved, and of course organise, a free-kick routine.
But it was midway through the second-half, and with the score delicately
balanced at 1-1, that Jose' made his most significant, and final contribution.
魔力鳥有些精彩的表現, 讓比分保持在 1-1
With the game up for grabs, and a press gang effort heading for the bottom
corner of his net, an elastic save prevented Chelsea going 2-1 down, but not
without the elastic snapping. A Portuguese hamstring had gone.
然後他漂亮的救球讓切爾西不至陷入 2-1 的局面, 但是他的腳筋也掰掰了...
At first, some suspected he was having everyone on, and with the Chelsea
physios making up a large part of the midfield, it took some frantic gestures
for the manager to convince his staff to forget their marking duties and give
him some treatment. Needless to say, his game was over.
一開始大家以為他只是在作戲, 老大揮動誇張的手勢好一陣子才把醫療人員叫來
(那群醫療人員在比賽裡擔任中場, 正在盡職地開著玩笑)
Not that Jose' was the first member of the first team staff to leave the
field. Unfortunately there was no post-match press conference for manager for
the afternoon, director of communications Simon Greenberg, to explain how
Chelsea at one point fielded 12 players, resulting in a second yellow card
and a dismissal for fitness coach Rui Faria.
老大不是一隊第一個離場的球員, 在賽後記者會上 Simon Greenberg 說
有一刻切爾西隊有十二個人在場上, 他們因此拿了第二張黃牌,
而體能教練 Rui Faria 則被踢下場.
Chelsea had organised the match officials and perfect proof of the integrity
of that arrangement was the three bookings to none and two good penalty
appeals turned down that hindered the quest for the elusive opening goal.
Cheered into every tackle by a watching first team squad, they survived a
scare when The Times pair of Matt Dickenson and Matt Hughes combined with The
Standard's Leo Spall for a shot on goal but even the most biased reporting
couldn't deny it was the Staff who looked most like scoring.
With French physio Thierry Laurant nicking possession like Makelele and
distributing like Leboeuf, the blue shirts pressed and it took some effective
more than stylish goalkeeping by The Mirror's John Cross to keep them out.
醫療師 Thierry Laurant 控球像馬克來來, 分球像 Leboeuf.
藍軍壓制著對方, 但鏡報的 John Cross 很有效率的化解危機
Finally the goal came - chelseafc.com's very own Andy Jones leaving The Daily
Mail's Neil Ashton and The Independent's Sam Wallace for dead before lashing
in and high-fiving with the England football captain in celebration.
Steve Clarke almost doubled the lead with a looping header but with not long
to go, disaster struck - a handball in the area and a Press penalty.
Mourinho, still on the pitch at that point, found McGarry unreadable and was
sent the wrong way.
So 1-1 was the scoreline at the final whistle but this is America. We had to
have a winner.
最後比分是 1-1, 但因為我們在美國, 所以一定要有個贏家.
Replacement for the lame Mourinho had been his faithful goalkeeper coach
Silvino. It had all boiled down to a penalty shoot-out dual between
Portugal's most capped keeper of all-time and John Cross, the man from The
Mirror still suffering from a 'reducer' put in on him shortly before the
whistle by one of Roman Abramovich's bodyguards, operating as a good
old-fashioned English centre-forward.
取代跛腳穆守在切爾西大門的是忠心的門將教練 Silvino.
所以當最終要用點球來分勝負時, 這是個為葡萄牙國家隊出戰最多次的 Silvino
與鏡報 John Cross 的對決.
With the Chelsea side already leading 3-1 on spot kicks, it fell to Jose''s
right-hand man Baltemar Brito to apply the coup de grace with a Brazilian
flourish. Chelsea had won the big one.
當切爾西以 3-1 在點球大戰領先時, 我們派出老大的左右手 Baltemar Brito
以巴西風華結束了對手的苦難. 切爾西贏了!
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這篇超好笑的, 不過我只挑了有趣+我會翻的部份翻... orz
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