作者carter09 (We Still Believe)
看板Knicks
標題[外電] Better Days for the Knicks? Dream On
時間Sun Feb 24 23:29:22 2008
這篇外電好惡搞.......外國人也喜歡做夢....
原文連結:
http://0rz.tw/873Hq
I had a dream the other night, a dream that was too good to be true.
那天我做了個夢，如果可以成真該有多好?!
I was in an otherwise empty Madison Square Garden that was set up for a
Knicks game, only me and a rumpled little man sitting in the front row who
looked like James L. Dolan, the cable guy, and he was babbling about what he
had finally decided to do about his alleged professional basketball team.
那天到了空蕩蕩的花園準備觀賞尼克的比賽。只有我和一個貌似大老板的人坐在前排
座位。他胡謅的說到他準備對這支不成才球隊做的事情。
“I’m returning the New York franchise to the National Basketball
Association,” he said. “As of now, the Knicks no longer exist.”
我已經把球隊的經營權還給NBA。事實上，尼克隊已經不存在了。
I was tempted to tell him that the Knicks have not really existed for several
seasons, not the Knicks that New York knew and loved, the Knicks of Red
Holzman and Willis Reed, Walt Frazier, Dave DeBusschere, Bill Bradley, Dick
Barnett and Earl Monroe that won two championships, or even the Knicks of Pat
Riley and Jeff Van Gundy and Patrick Ewing, Charles Oakley, John Starks,
Allan Houston and Larry Johnson that twice went to the finals. But he kept
babbling.
我很想要跟他說尼克精神不存在不是一兩季的事了。不再是我們深愛的尼克，不再是
七零年代那隻兩次拿下總冠軍的球隊，不再是九零年代兩次闖進最後決賽的勁旅。大老闆
還是胡謅著。
“As of now the Knicks no longer exist,” he repeated.
“尼克隊這個名詞已經不存在了。他再次的重複。”
I told him that a pro basketball franchise and a team can’t simply cease to
exist in the middle of the season.
我提醒他一支職業隊不可能在季中輕易消失。
“I don’t care. I’m canceling the rest of the season.”
“我不在乎，我會取消剩下的球季。”
You mean you’re forfeiting the remaining games?
“你是說你會沒收剩下來的比賽?!”我問到。
“Home and away,” he said. “Anybody who bought tickets for any of those
games will get refunds. Home and away.”
“主場和客場。任何曾經購票的球迷都會拿到退款，主客場都是。”
‧
What happens to the players?
球員們怎麼辦?!
“I’ll pay them whatever millions remain on their contracts for whatever
number of years, and they’ll be free to go anywhere else.
“我會支付他們剩下來的薪水，不管還有幾年的合約。現在，他們自由了。他們可以去
任何他們想要去的地方。”
“If any other team wants them,” he added, with a smirk.
“如果還有球隊想要他們的話。”大老闆笑著補了這句。
“The last time I watched them play, whatever five guys were on the court,
they looked like they were five strangers we had hired off Eighth Avenue that
night. No teamwork on offense, no rebounds, no defense.”
“我最後一次看這五個人在場上比賽，就像五個我們隨便從街上拉來的陌生人一樣。沒
有一點團隊合作的感覺，進攻、籃板、防守都是。”
What happens to the assistants?
助教怎麼辦?!
“The assistant coaches and everybody in the front office get all the money
that’s coming to them, too.”
“助理教練和管理人員都會拿到他們該得的金錢。”
What happens to Isiah?
笑笑湯呢?!
“Who’s Isiah?” he said.
“誰是笑笑湯?!”
Isiah Thomas, your coach and president for basketball operations.
你的總教練兼籃球事務部總管。
“Oh, that Isiah.”
“喔，那個Isiah。”
Yes, that Isiah.
是阿，那個Isiah。
“I thought Isiah was his last name. When all those fans were yelling, ‘Fire
Isiah,’ I thought they were cheering for him. I thought Fire was his first
name.”
“我還以為他姓Isiah。當球迷鬼叫著:Fire Isiah，我以為他們在為它喝采。我還在想Fire
才是他的名字。”
But what happens to Isiah?
老湯要怎麼辦?!
“He’s on the Cablevision payroll now. I thought about using him as a
repairman, but that’s what I thought I was getting when I hired him to fix
the Knicks more than four years ago. If he couldn’t fix the Knicks, I doubt
he could fix somebody’s cable TV if it’s not working. So maybe I’ll just
let him work off the rest of his contract as a consultant.”
“喔，他喔，他現在轉到有線電視部門去啦。四年前，我請他來整治尼克。事實證明，他
把球隊搞的烏煙瘴氣。但我想，他可以把他的才能發揮在修理第四台線路上。現在他的新
職稱是有線電視線路顧問。”
Will you consult him?
那你會找他商量嗎?!
“Not if I can help it.”
“如果他肯聽我的勸就好了。”
Does all this mean that there won’t be a New York franchise in the N.B.A.
next season?
意思是說下一季NBA不會有一支屬於紐約的球隊嗎?!
“No, somebody probably will buy the New York franchise by then.”
“可能會有其他人買下紐約的經營權吧。”
In returning the franchise to the N.B.A., does that mean you’re putting the
Knicks up for sale?
回到經營權這件事上，你的意思是說會把尼克賣掉嗎?!
“Not me.”
不是我。
Then who?
那會是誰!
“Commissioner David Stern told me he’s willing to broker the sale. When we
didn’t settle that sexual-harassment case before it went to trial and we
lost, eventually settling it for $11.5 million, he said that the Knicks were
‘not a model of intelligent management.’ Imagine that. Doesn’t he know
that Cablevision is a billion-dollar business?”
“大衛‧屎騰”，他說他會負責這個買賣。在性騷擾官司審判前，我們並沒有達成和解
。我們還輸了11.5M。他說尼克並不是經營的模範....想像一下，他難道不知道有線電視是
一個龐大的企業嗎?!
But on your watch, the Knicks have been nowhere near as successful as
Cablevision?
所以你認為你在經營尼克上跟你經營有線電視一樣成功?!
“Let me remind you that, according to Forbes magazine, the Knicks, with a
net worth of $608 million, are pro basketball’s most valuable franchise.”
“容我提醒你一件事，根據富比士雜誌調查，尼克總值608M，是職業籃球隊中最富有
的。”大老闆得意的說。
But that $608 million hasn’t bought a playoff berth in what will be seven
seasons, much less a championship.
但608M不能買到季後賽資格，我們已經連續七年沒有打進季後賽，更別說ㄗㄍㄐ。
“Playoffs, championships. They’re not the bottom line. The dummies who kept
buying Knicks season tickets at ridiculous prices, they’re the bottom line.
And in returning the Knicks franchise to the league, David Stern has assured
me that he’ll start the bidding for the franchise at $608 million. Now that’
s a bottom line.”
“對於沒打進季後賽、ㄗㄍㄐ我都可以忍受。對那些長年來用不合理的價錢購買尼克季
票的笨蛋來說，那才是他們不能忍受的。屎騰已經向我保證608M是拍賣的底價，那才是我
的底限。”
Will you let the new owner’s team play in the Garden?
那你會讓新老闆的球隊繼續留在麥迪遜嗎?!
“Under the deal I made with David Stern, the new owner can rent the Garden
for every home game for the same amount that the Knicks paid. Whatever amount
that was. To tell you the truth, I don’t know what it was.”
根據我們交易的內容，新老闆可以租借麥迪遜當作主場，只要他能付出和尼克相同的金
額。事實上，我根本不知道確切的金額是多少。
To tell me the truth?
事實上?!
“Of course,” he said.
當然，他說到。
With that, I woke up. Not wanting to forget anything, I hurriedly wrote down
everything that this rumpled little man who looked like James L. Dolan had
told me in the dream. And as crazy as that dream was, the next night, I
dreamed that I had to tell the commissioner about it. When I did, he laughed.
就在那一刻，我醒了。我趕忙把那個看似大老闆的人告訴我的所有事情紀錄下來。隔天
，當我告訴大老闆這件事時，他笑了。
“I’ve had the same dream,” he said.
“我也做了相同的夢。”
--
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◆ From: 218.164.112.106
推 datasi:希望不要成真 02/24 23:46
→ molemilk:不可能成真 不過我覺得高層不可能一直讓尼克隊放濫下去 02/25 00:00
推 stephenho:As of now the Knicks no longer exist 新版名? 唉唉... 02/25 00:00
※ knicksss:轉錄至看板 NBA 02/25 00:02
推 knicksss:轉到nba給大家笑笑吧....唉 謝謝carter大的翻譯 02/25 00:02
推 jiuan1027: I Have A Dream: Fire Isiah 02/25 00:16
推 cty:老闆前天說尼克會是下一隻塞爾提克呢! 02/25 09:34
推 vvvvvip:ㄗㄍㄐ~~XD 02/25 11:27
→ carter09:while Knicks coach Isiah Thomas believe the playoffs 02/25 21:17
→ carter09:are still within reach. “Now is not the time,” 02/25 21:17
→ carter09: Thomas said when asked why Morris and rookie 02/25 21:17
→ carter09: Wilson Chandler are not playing 季後賽仍然有望? 02/25 21:18