Re: [請益] 麻煩各位幫我看下cover letter

[miniko70 (朧月夜)]

好了.. 經過各位板友的指點+參考了一些網站的sample

我砍掉重練了一個新的版本

改掉improve my English..一些詞語 還有一些怪異的文法

麻煩大家再幫我看下了..如果有什麼更好的寫法,也請再告訴我了

感謝各位m(_  _)m



MY NAME
1F., No.15, Xxx Rd., Xxx Dist.,
Taipei City, Taiwan
886-0000-000-000
March 22, 2013


Ms. Lily Lee
Personnel Manager
XXX Corporation


Dear Ms. Lee,

I was very excited to see your vacancy for a web developer position which was
advertised on the job123 website.

Having several years experience in the industry. I love building website, and
I hope it is popular with everyone. This is a perfect career which bring
me enthusiasm and satisfaction. I am finding a web development and overseas
job which can broaden my horizons and utilising my experience, knowledge and
skills to benefit a company. My related experience as follows.

* Knowledge of PHP OOP Programming, MVC Framework and MySQL.
* Coding using front-end technologies, such as HTML, CSS, JavaScript, jQuery.
* Familiar with NetBeans, Enterprise Architect, UML, SVN, XAMPP etc.
* Welcome new challenges and learning new skills.

I invite you to review my works of site
(http://xxx.xxx.com) . It will show you that I am a capable and professional
individual.

As you can see from my enclosed resume both of Chinese and English for your
reference. Thank you for your time and consideration, I am looking forward to
hearing from you soon.



Yours faithfully,
MY NAME



--
※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc) 
◆ From: 1.164.35.99
推 smi1e:主要都是英文跟文法的問題,CV的表達上很ok了..
→ smi1e:找個人幫你改英文就好了:)
→ umum29:恩 我覺得差不多了 開始準備其他部分吧~ 加油
推 dobb:good like your attitude
→ miniko70:那我就放心了 謝謝大家^^!
→ soncan:用英文寫一篇cover letter的確挑戰，不知道你的讀者語文
推 soncan:能力與背景如何？我感覺你已充分流露出對這個領域熱忱，
推 soncan:但是Perfect,enthusiasm,satisfaction 這幾個字還無法幫助
推 soncan:我了解你為什有熱忱，到底是web develop中的那些過程或結果
推 soncan:帶給你什麼感受ex.成就感,自我挑戰,解決問題,從中學到新知
推 soncan:等,（我隨便舉例）,是我會把這些寫出,be more specific，
→ soncan:讓人知道你跟這個領域獨特個人化的連結
推 soncan:加油，若有冒犯,還希望你見諒^^|
推 doki777:可以寫dear hiring manager, 收到履歷的人會很開心
→ miniko70:OK好的~謝謝S大的指點哦!用這些來形容可能有點太抽象了
→ miniko70:那我再多增加一點具體的描述好了~thank u^^!
→ miluco:文法有許多錯誤，看起來不是很順暢，可以找英文系的幫忙改
→ miluco:一下,比方說finding job > 用looking for a position就好一
→ miluco:一點
→ miniko70:好的 謝謝\\(難怪履歷雖然被人資開了但都還沒找我面試 凹