[揭弊] Top 50: Carlos Boozer, no. 32

[popstarkirby (中肯 正直 不嘴砲 POP)]

http://preview.tinyurl.com/ye3mqcz


Some people will never respect Carlos Boozer. He’s from Alaska, which is
where Sarah Palin is from so… Who likes that state, anyway? He played at
Duke. First off, nobody likes a devil that isn’t red, and Duke players make
bad pros on principle alone. And he sued Prince. You don’t sue Prince. You
accept that he painted purple hieroglyphs on your house and go about your
business. He left LeBron. He could have been an all-shoulders-no-handles
Pippen! The King might have actually had a ring (or two) at this point.

Forget those people, they can’t be saved. You still have a chance. You know
who else is from Alaska? Mario Chalmers. He launched the harpoon that killed
Moby Di- (ahem) Memphis, coached by John “habitual line-stepper” Calipari.
Chalk one point to Alaska.

Now, let’s be clear on the “Duke players are garbage in the NBA” rule of
basketball. Yes, it’s true as a general rule. But Carlos is clearly the “
exceptio probat regulam in casibus non exceptis,” or as us non-Duke educated
would say: The exception that proves the rule. He was a solid basketball
player coming out of college, got no respect coming into the League (got
drafted after Ryan Humphrey and Robert Archibald. Haven’t heard of those
dominant, sure fire pros? My sentiments exactly), yet still became a lock for
a double-double by his second year in the NBA. Let’s put a pin in that, we’
ll get back to it later.


Suing Prince? That just-skimming-the-5-foot-tall-horizon, formerly known as
midget needs to calm down. You don’t rent a house, then paint your own
sexual symbols on it. And if that’s not acceptable, neither is a purple
monogrammed carpet installed in the master bedroom with plumbing and piping
added in the downstairs bedroom “for water transfer for beauty salon chairs.
” (The Smoking Gun) You don’t pull that shit with the Booz’. You do that,
and you will get touched.

Finally, let’s address his own personal “get the hell out of Dodge”
 moment. Russ Bengtson said it best:

The Cavs shredded the last year of his rookie deal and were going to sign him
to a six-year, $39 million extension, hoping to lock him in long-term before
he turned into a max guy. Then the Jazz stepped in with a six-year, $70
million offer, and that was that. My math isn’t too good, but that’s
roughly 31 million reasons to go West. Even LeBron told him to get that
money. (In hindsight, perhaps not shocking.) 2) Then-coach Paul Silas more or
less told CBooz that he’d just be a role player in Cleveland. A rebounder
and defender. That’s the way Boozer explained it to me the last time we
spoke, and I have no reason to disbelieve him: “I was happy [Silas] told me
that, because I saw what he wanted for my future. That helped ease my
decision a little bit. I couldn’t wait to come to Utah and play. I hope he
can see what I’m doin’ now, I’ll tell you that.”

Glad we could straighten that out.

Cut forward to 2009. Boozer is coming off a season where he only played 37
games due to a knee injury. He’s also coming off of a summer where he
demanded trades and named possible suitors. The trade possibilities didn’t
work out; he’s still part of the Utah Jazz. The situation isn’t resolved,
money is always a big issue and things could get ugly. They could, if not for
Carlos’ mentality as a basketball player.

Coach K had this to say about his player from Duke and the Olympics: “
Carlos, with his teammates, was sensational. He still is. The only times that
I’ve ever had to get on Carlos was to say ‘Take more shots!’ There was
never a jealous bone in his body; I love coaching Carlos. I’d take him on my
team anytime.”

There is no guarantee that Carlos will be the ideal teammate for the Jazz
during the full season, he could always get traded during the year.
Regardless, one thing can be certain; He will be playing in the rarified air
of the “Contract Year.”

Boozer is going to want to get paid. You don’t want to be the guy who goes
from having a second contract worth the ballpark range of 70 million clams to
have his next contract be less! This is America, home of obesity, bad
fundamentals and capitalism; we like our stars playing on the mantra of “the
rich get richer” both literally and figuratively. The only way for him to
fulfill that is to play his ass off. His last season was a short one.
Thirty-seven games — or about three Gilbert Arenas seasons — are not
enough. He needs to come back with that 20 and 12 fire that he had in ’07.

He has fuel for the fire, so where’s the wood? His drop-step? Still cold
blooded. Even if his knees gave out, those boulder-shoulders will stay there
for life, prepared for the drop-step. His stop and pop from 15? “Smooth as a
cruise boat floats when I’m walking.” Even if he does release it on the way
down, it’s wet. Even if the stores in Utah aren’t. Career rebounding
average? 10 per game. There’s your wood.

Are there haters still reading along? Just close your eyes and repeat the
following:

“Even though he went to Duke, I have to give him this: He’s got an NCAA
National Championship. He’s got a gold medal from the Olympics. He’s
averaged 20 and 10 for multiple seasons. He’s one of the best power forwards
in the NBA.”

Just repeat that five times at breakfast in your mirror, everything will be
alright.









很棒的一系列文

Booooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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推 monmo:我記得這個排名好像都出來了!?
推 makswu:這是虎撲一系列翻譯文的原文嗎
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推 zeals:薪水37th，還蠻公道的~~ 也不算超值就是了
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推 gratitude:Boozer你的FB會選Millsap嗎?
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