作者 tsunami (Runaway) 站內 nthuee00
標題 [轉錄]轉寄 : Lesson
時間 Thu Feb 17 13:55:21 2000
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※ 本文轉錄自 [nthuee96] 看板
作者: Uranus (台灣地圖王子) 站內: nthuee96
標題: [轉錄]轉寄 : Lesson
時間: Wed Feb 16 18:02:58 2000
※ 本文轉錄自 [Uranus] 信箱
作者: albert.lee2@ite.com.tw
標題: 轉寄 : Lesson
時間: Wed Feb 16 16:14:57 2000
> 材自中國湖北師範學校英聽教材,
>
> Lesson number one 第一課
> ----------------------------------
> A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
> 有一隻 烏鴉整天就坐在樹上，但就是不做事。
>
> A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him,
> 之後就有一隻兔子看到 烏鴉 就問說:
>
> "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?"
> 我能學你這樣子就坐在這兒整天不用做事嗎？
>
> The crow answered: "Sure, why not."
> 烏鴉 就說啦：當然可以，為啥不行？
>
> So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.
> 所以，兔子就在樹的底下休息起來，
>
> All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
> 突然的，有一隻狐狸出現把兔子給吃了。
>
> Moral of the story is:
> 這故事告訴你：
>
> To be sitting and doing nothing,
> 想要整天坐著不做事，
>
> you must be sitting very, very high up.
> 你就必須高高在上......
>
>
> Lesson number two 第二課
> ----------------------------------
>
> A turkey was chatting with a bull.
> 有一隻火雞跟一隻公牛在聊天。
>
> "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,"
> 火雞說：我真的很想爬到這樹枝頭上耶！
>
> sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
> 但是我沒力氣.....
>
> "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?"replied the bull.
> 牛說：嗯......沒關係，那你要不要吃一點我的牛大便(英譯：狗屁，屁話呢？)
>
> "They're packed with nutrients."
> 我的牛大便是很營養的喔。
>
> The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually
> gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.
> 火雞就吃了很多牛大便，就變的很強壯足夠讓火雞爬上第一排的樹枝。
>
> The next day, after eating some more dung,
> 接下來的一天，火雞又吃了很多牛大便(狗屁，屁話）
>
> he reached the second branch.
> 讓火雞可以爬上第二排枝頭。
>
> Finally after a fornight,
> 最後，兩個禮拜過後，
>
> there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
> 火雞終於爬上枝頭很安穩的在休息，
>
> Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer,
> 好景不常，一位農夫發現這隻火雞，
>
> who shot the turkey out of the tree.
> 開槍把火雞打死了。
>
> Moral of the story:
> 這故事告訴你：
>
> Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
> （狗屁，屁話）或許可以讓你爬的更高，但不可能讓你成功一輩子。
>
>
> Lesson number three 第三課
> ----------------------------------
>
> When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss.
> 當一個身體剛完成的時候，所有的器官想要當這身體的老大。
>
> The brain said, " I should be Boss because I control the whole body's
> responses and functions.
> 頭腦就說；我應該當老大，因為我支配著整個身體的運作，反應跟功能。
>
> The hands said, " We should be the Boss because we do all the work and
> earn all the money."
> 接著手就說了；我應該當老大因為都是我在做事賺錢。
>
> And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until
> finally the asshole spoke up.
> 所以這樣的爭執就一直繼續著，心臟，肺臟跟眼睛也加入爭執，最後屁眼（英譯：
> 白癡）說話了......我要當老大！！！
>
> All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss.
> So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.
> 所有的器官一同取笑屁眼想當老大，屁眼一氣之下，將自己塞起來，不爽，罷工去了
>
>
> Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet
> twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.
> 在很短的時間內，眼睛，手，腳就開始不聽使喚，心臟，肺臟也開始失去功能
>
> Eventually they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss,so the
> motion was passed.
> 最後，大家還是決議讓屁眼當老大，
>
> All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed
> out the shit!
> 所以, 當所有的器官都在做事時, 就老大坐著拉屎 (英譯：說屁話)
>
> Moral of the story:
> 這故事告訴你：
>
> You don't need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will do.
> 想當老大？哈！任何白癡都可以當老大！！！～～～
>
>
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