推 JamesCaesar:先推啊，蠻好笑的 61.63.105.32 12/09
※ 編輯: wadissimo 來自: 80.229.140.103 (12/09 01:00)
推 kj1331:我還以為槍迷叫新球場"酋長" 就不會被打了 140.112.25.178 12/09
BBC 606也是英超每個球隊各一個版
所以砲兵版不時會有人來嗆聲
當然也會有砲兵球迷跑到其他版去嗆聲
在此再PO幾個我看過的笑話給各位看看
我看得笑話有兩類，一種是無知的對手球迷腦袋裡的footie knowledge不多就來嗆
像是：
小白一：
"我們的X尼第一次歐冠首發就上演帽子戲法
你們兵工廠有球員在歐冠單場進三球嗎？"
砲兵迷回吐：
"有！就是亨利！而且不是像你們的X尼在主場，對一支幾年沒在歐洲客場贏球的球隊
進三球，而是作客羅馬進三球。"
然後那個小白就店店了.....
小白二(這是今天我看到的)：
"你們一直說預備隊的十七歲的Anthony Stokes多厲害多厲害，既然那麼厲害，
為何從沒入選英格蘭U18？"
砲兵回吐：
"Stokes是愛爾蘭人，怎麼可能入選英格蘭U18？"
又一個小白落馬....
小白三：
"FA是你們家開的，FA都故意跟我們作對"
這個是我親手把他了結掉，我直接貼出BBC的連結，說副主席Dein八月就已經辭去
在FA的職務，所以FA對你們怎麼壞？干砲兵屁事？
那天我了結了兩個小白...
第二類的就是一般的footie jokes，有的是新的，有的是老笑話改編的，像是下面這個
(我簡短的翻譯一下)：
Maybe you've seen it but it's funny Gunnergotopagain - 6th post - 6 Dec 2004
14:36
A Chelsea fan, an Arsenal fan and a Manchester United fan were all in Arabia,
sharing a smuggled crate of booze when, all of a sudden, Saudi police rushed
in and arrested them. The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offence in
Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming
the booze, they are all sentenced to death!
三個英超球迷，各支持契爾西，曼聯，跟兵工廠，試著在阿拉伯走私一箱酒進沙烏地
阿拉伯，結果被警察逮到，有可能被處死刑。
However, after many months and with the help of very good lawyers, they are
able to successfully appeal their sentences down to life imprisonment. By a
stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial finished,
and the extremely benevolent Sheikh decided they could be released after
receiving just 20 lashes each of the whip. As they were preparing for their
punishment, the Sheikh announced: "It's my first wife's birthday today, and
she has asked me to allow each of you one wish before your whipping." The
Chesea fan was first in line, he thought for a while and then said: "Please
tie a pillow to my back." This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10
lashes before the whip went through. When the punishment was done he had
to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain.
還好，這三個人請了個好律師，經過數個月的法律的纏訟，總算把死刑凹成無
期徒刑，剛好法院終結之日，是沙烏地國定假日，一個仁慈的沙烏地酋長見這三人
時說，今天剛好是他老婆生日，所以他可以放這三人一馬只要各挨二十鞭就可以被釋放
，而且每個人可以在受鞭刑前，許一個願。
契爾西球迷首先受刑，他對酋長說，我的願望是，能在我背上綁個枕頭再挨鞭子。
酋長准許，於是這球迷背上綁了個枕頭挨鞭子，不過當挨了第十鞭後，枕頭綻開來，
所以藍軍球迷還是扎扎實實挨了十鞭，一邊哀嚎一邊被抬出。
The Man- U fan was next up. After watching the Scouser in horror he said
smugly: "Please fix two pillows to my back." But even two pillows could
only take 15 lashes before the whip went through again and the Man- U fan
was soon led away whimpering loudly (as they do). The Arsenal fan was the
last one up, but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him
and said: "You support one of the biggest clubs in the world and your
team is the finest in the world.
曼聯球迷是下一個，目睹了契爾西球迷的教訓後，他臉帶奸笑的像酋長說，我的願望
是綁兩個枕頭，結果紅魔球迷被抽到第十五鞭時，枕頭綻開，他還是挨了五鞭，還一
邊哀嚎。
輪到砲兵球迷了，酋長對他說：我知道你支持的是世界上最大的球會，最好的球隊，
為此，你可以有兩個願望。
For this, you may have two wishes!" "Thank you, your Most Royal and Merciful
highness", he replied. "In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is
that you give me not 20 lashes but, 100 lashes." "Not only are you an
honourable, handsome and powerful man, you are also very brave". The
Sheikh said with an admiring look on his face. "If 100 lashes is what
you desire, then so be it. And your second wish"?
這球迷說：謝謝酋長的恩惠，為了回應您的寬大慈悲，我的第一個願望是我要挨
一百鞭，不是二十鞭。酋長說：你不但誠實又帥又高貴，勇氣也可嘉，好吧，
就賞你一百鞭！那你的第二個願望是？
(各位不妨猜一下)
"Tie the Man- U fan to my back."
砲兵迷回答：把那個曼聯球迷綁在我背上。XD
(完)
re: Maybe you've seen it but it's funny FRANK? - 8th post - 6 Dec
2004 14:40
you forgot to change "scouser". if you're gonna change jokes around
to suit your own devices, get it right.
看到這原笑話裡面沒有契爾西，而是利物浦。
re: Maybe you've seen it but it's funny Gunnergotopagain - 8th
post - 6 Dec 2004 14:49
You're right. I changed Liverpool to Chelsea alright (to suit
current scenario) but forgot Scouser.
re: Maybe you've seen it but it's funny TC - 422nd post - 6 Dec
2004 14:41
bootiful!
這人不知道是藍軍的還是紅魔的，就對這笑話作評語：boo-tiful。
(boo是英文"噓"的意思，bootiful就是取另一個單字的諧音beautiful，
，反正就是在噓PO這笑話的人)
re: Maybe you've seen it but it's funny may2689 - 545th post -
6 Dec 2004 14:42
Very good....lol! [reply] [Complain about this post]
其他的槍迷當然就是被這笑話逗笑囉(應該跟我一樣是第一次看到這笑話)
--
'The difference between you and me is that if tomorrow there were
no more money in football I'd still be here, but not you'.
-- a quote of Wenger's saying to an agent
--
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