Dweight: She's in a better place.
Angela *sobbing*: alright
Dweight: actually, the place she's in is the freezer.
--
Angela: I'm having relationship problems, and since you're always having
relationship problems, I thought you could give me some advice.
Pam: What's wrong?
Angela: I know this is crazy, but I think Dwight killed my cat.
Pam: hmm
Angela: When I got home, Sprinkles' body was in the freezer where he said
he left her. But all my bags of frozen french fries had been clawed to shreds.
Something's not right! The vet's doing an autopsy.
Pam: I'm sorry
Angela: Did Roy ever kill one of your cats?
Pam: I'm more of a dog person
Angela: *Rolls eyes and walks away*
--
Angela: The vet's removing all of Sprinkle's organs and sending them to the
lab
Dweight: I am a farmer Angela
Angela: What does that mean?
Dweight: When a farmer sees an animal that is in pain, and that has no utility,
a farmer does what city folk do not have the heart to do.
Angela: You did kill her!
Dweight: I sang her her favourite songs.
Angela: YOU PUT HER IN MY FREEZER
Dweight: It was beautiful, and gentle, and respectful. I gave her anti-
histamines and she gradually fell asleep.
Angela: Well she tore up my freezer and tried to get out
Dweight: I'm not responsible for that!
--
--
Dweight: I took care of that cat the best way I knew how
Angela: Cat heaven is a beautiful place, but you don't get there if you're
euthanized.
Dweight: I know a great taxodermist, I'll pay to get her stuffed.
--
--
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