Mirror Image
By Aidin Vaziri
It's the mid-weeks of June, and the Rev. Jerry Falwell has gone to
all the major newspapers and declared the Lilith Fair tour
blasphemous on the grounds of its blatant feminism and resounding
pro-choice message. This is the kind of thing that makes Sarah
McLachlan roll her eyes.
When the 31-year-old Canadian singer-songwriter started the
annual tour in 1996, the last thing on her mind was politics. She just
thought Lilith Fair would be a good excuse to get a bunch of girls
with guitars together and provide an antidote to all the
testosterone-enhanced summer road shows like Ozzfest,
Warped, and Lollapalooza.
Now that the tour has become a lightning rod for absurd
controversy, McLachlan figures it's time to move on. She's
planning on taking an extended vacation after this year's
farewell tour, which ironically boasts Lilith's strongest and most
diverse lineup yet: Sheryl Crow, Cibo Matto, Hole, Indigo Girls,
the Pretenders, Dixie Chicks, Sandra Bernhard, Beth Orton, and
others.
In the meantime, McLachlan is leaving her fans with a live album
called Mirrorball and the promise that she will return in a better
state of mind.
CDNOW: Why do you think so many people try to politicize
Lilith Fair?
Sarah McLachlan: What I've discovered is people have their
own agendas, and this is a great bandwagon to jump onto to
voice those agendas. Sometimes it's with us, and sometimes
it's against us. I'm not even going to legitimize some of the
tags that people are trying to put onto Lilith. It's certainly
bizarre. Typically we ignore it, unless it gets too obnoxious.
Do you consider yourself a militant feminist?
My trouble is I haven't read enough on feminism to say that I am
a feminist. Apparently they're trying to change the word
feminist, because it doesn't apply any more. I just can't keep up.
I totally believe we should be treated equally and I believe we
have a long way to go. In that sense, the old school sense of
feminist, I am very much a feminist. But I'm not the kind of
feminist who hates men. I love men. I think men are just as
misunderstood as women. We all need to damn well get along.
So this tour is not about men bashing?
No. I've said that countless times.
I don't think people want to hear that, though.
No, and this is what I mean when I say people have their own
agendas. To the hard-core feminist, Lilith Fair is pathetic
because it's not doing anything. It's almost worse. And to some
redneck people it's like [drawls], "Oh, you hate men. You want
to cut my dick off?" It's like, no, you're more than welcome. No
one is going to hurt you.
"My trouble is I haven't read enough on feminism
to say that I am a feminist."
Originally, all you were really doing was getting some
artists that you liked together.
Exactly. But I'll tell you what, it's made me political to recognize
and realize all the negativity around. In saying that, I have to
say the press has been hugely supportive and the general public
gets it, but there's always a certain amount of, "Why isn't it
more like this? Why isn't it more like that." Anytime you do
something there's going to be people saying that.
So what do you plan to do with your time off?
I can't see that far ahead. I'm going to take the next year off,
meaning I'm not going to tour. I'm going to continue to write,
but I'm not going to do any gigs. I'm not going to be out in the
spotlight. I'm not going to do any interviews. I just want to float
on the opportunity to not make any plans. It's a totally luxurious
position to be in; I'm very much aware of that.
Why did you decide to release a live album?
I love playing live. It's a huge part of what I do, so I guess I
wanted to try and capture some of that energy, which is
difficult. I feel like we did a pretty good job. I wanted to
document where we were at as performers and as a band.
Because I'm going away for a while and I'm not going to put out
a new studio record, I wanted to give fans something in the
downtime.
Judging by a cursory glance at all the Web sites, your fans
can get a bit passionate. Does their devotion ever make
you nervous?
No, but there's a lot of misinformation out there.
What do you think makes them so crazy about you?
I suppose it's the emotional response that they feel to my music.
I say this because I have talked to a lot of people, and that's
the general answer. They feel like I'm singing directly to them.
They feel I have somehow got inside their heads and understand
exactly what they're feeling.
Do you have ESP?
Emotions are a pretty basic thing. We only have certain and
rather obvious ways to describe them. A lot of my lyrics
are based on trying to understand what I'm feeling and what
it is other people are feeling and trying to move beyond.
Often the lyrics aren't about how to move beyond it; they're
more about being in it. I guess that's where people react to it
so strongly.
You're not afraid to admit you don't have things sorted out
in your life.
Well who does? That's the thing.
At the same time, you must feel somewhat self-assured.
I feel so happy with what I've been able to achieve so far in my
life, and it's been such an incredible ride. It's nothing that I
anticipated. I never expected to be hugely successful with my
music. I just didn't take it that far. I just thought it would be
really nice if people enjoyed it as much as I do. What a bonus
that I actually make a damn good living doing this. I think I just
came out of a place that was so na鴳e when I started that I
didn't even think about it.
This is my dream, this is what I wanted to do, and I just feel so
lucky that I got an opportunity to do it. I always go back and
remember that, and I suppose that's part of what helps me keep
my feet on the ground.
"I never expected to be hugely successful with my
music. I just didn't take it that far. I just thought it
would be really nice if people enjoyed it as much as
I do. What a bonus that I actually make a damn
good living doing this."
At what point did you make the realization that it was going
to happen for you?
I think it was a pretty slow reckoning. I don't think anything
happened overnight. I find, as in life, you tend to feel like you're
taking two steps forward and one step back. I certainly don't
feel self-assured all the time. I'm certainly more so in that
head-frame now than I was five or six years ago.
For me, when I put out a record and I feel really proud that I've
done a great job with it, I'm on top of the world. Two years
later, after I've been touring for that long and I feel dead and
don't know who I am anymore, well, then I don't feel so
self-assured. I think if anything, life is about learning how to
create a balance for yourself, whatever that is.
What is your favorite photograph of yourself?
The first thing that came to mind, I don't know if it's actually my
favorite, was the cover of Rolling Stone. I was very happy with
that. Everybody asks, "What was the yellow stuff on your face?"
Of course, it was mustard seed because I was rolling around in
mustard flowers. I enjoyed that because it was a very
misunderstood photo. It was cute, I liked it. I hardly had any
make-up on, it was very fresh, just playing in fields. It was very
easy. The photographer was this really groovy, surf-chick type
of gal. She had me pegged.
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