[外絮] TSM Bjergsen談打職業前的生活

[kaneggyy (負けないで！)]

原文來自Bjergsen本人FB
https://www.facebook.com/BjergsenLoL/posts/676609642362402
以下為了我翻譯方便所以我擅自分段了


With my recent success and happiness, I wanted to share with you guys how my
life was before LCS, and how much it has changed to this date.
隨著我最近的一些成就和喜悅，我想跟各位分享一下我在LCS以前的人生，和我是
怎麼達到現在這一步的。

My school life was never very good, my grades were fine, but I had other
things that made me want to stay away from there. Ever since about 4th/5th
grade I was bullied a lot, it's hard to be the tiny skinny kid in school. You
cannot fight back, and you cannot win. I was bullied mostly by my male
classmates and my teacher, so I never felt like it would stop. Since the
authority was bullying me too, if anything I felt like he was supporting it.
My escapes during depression were always video games, it was what I did as
soon as I got back from school. It was kind of my dirty little secret, since
gaming was frowned upon, and I didn't want to give them more resources to
bully me with.
我的學校生活從來都沒好過。我的成績還好，但是有些其他的事情讓我不想去學校。
自從四五年級之後我就常常被欺負，一個又瘦又小的小孩子在學校是很難過的，你沒
辦法反抗，你也不會贏。我大部分都是被男同學和老師欺負，所以老實說我從來不覺
得這種狀況會停止。連老師都在欺負我，讓我覺得他似乎也支持這樣的事。對我來說
，在我意志消沈的時候我的避風港一直都是電玩遊戲，我當時幾乎一回家就開始玩。
這像是我的一個不可告人的小秘密，當時玩遊戲不是很被認同的事，而且我也不想給
他們其他的理由欺負我。

I had some rough years, but finally made it to 8th grade, where I would
change to a bigger school with a new teacher. Around this time I was really
depressed and didn't want to go to school anymore. Yet I felt like the new
school could be my new chance at life, also it was mandatory to go, so I
never really had a choice.
當年我過的很難受，不過最後我還是成功的升上八年級，我將會去一個更大的學校，
會遇到新的老師。當時我真的非常低落而且再也不想去學校，不過我覺得新學校可能
會是我人生的一個新轉機，而且上學也是個義務，所以老實說我也沒什麼選擇。

Unfortunately at this school the bullying between my classmates got a lot
more physical and it ended up with me hardly ever being in school. After
about half a year I dropped out of school due to depression and anxiety.
I was in the worst state of my life, I would hardly talk to anyone outside
my family. I sat inside my room all day every day playing League of Legends
as my escape. It was the only thing that made sense to me, and the only
thing i enjoyed. My parents made numerous attempts to get me back to school
but it would never last more than a week until I had another breakdown and
stopped going.
不幸的是在這個學校，同學的欺負變成更多肢體上的欺負，結局變得我一度沒辦法再
去學校。過了半年之後，因為情緒低落和焦慮，我不再去學校了。那是我人生最糟糕
的時期，我幾乎沒辦法跟家人以外的人講話。我就躲在房間裡， 每天玩LoL來當做逃
避。對我來說這是唯一有意義的事，也是我唯一感到快樂的事。我的父母想了好幾種
方法來嘗試讓我回去學校，然而都持續不到一週，我就會崩潰然後不再去學校。

Around this time I started getting good at League and reached really high
elo, getting recognition from good players. I started playing online
tournaments for tiny amounts of money, but just getting anything from
playing was amazing to me. After many teams, I finally ended up in the team
that would change my life... Copenhagen Wolves.
就在這時期我的LoL越打越好， 我達到了相當高的積分，而且也開始被一些好玩家認
識。我開始打一些線上賽事賺一點小錢，光是可以從玩遊戲得到東西就讓我覺得超級
驚奇。然後在待過許多隊伍後，我最後來到了一支改變我人生的隊伍...
Copenhagen Wolves。

We went to my first event at dream hack in the winter of 2012. I almost
ended up not going because the anxiety was getting to me, but Deficio
(who was our manager at the time) eventually, after a long talk with me
and my dad, talked me into going, promising that he would watch over me, and
help me with anything that I needed.
2012年冬天我們參加了我第一個線下賽事：Dream Hack。我差點就因為焦慮而不去了
，然而當時還是我們經理的Deficio跟我和我爸談了很久， 說服我去，保證他會好好
照顧我並且幫忙我需要的任何事情。

I was an extremely awkward kid who didn't know how to do anything by himself,
so having someone like Deficio who could help me out if I ever needed
anything really lowered my anxiety level. At dream hack we finished 3rd and
qualified for the LCS qualifier, at this time all I really cared about was
that we actually won a decent amount of money, because I had no idea what
the LCS really was.
我當時是個超級笨拙的小孩子，幾乎沒辦法獨自做任何事情， 所以能有像Deficio這
樣的人可以幫助我讓我的焦慮降低了很多。在Dream Hack我們最後以第三名成績作收
，並且晉級LCS資格賽。 在這個時候我只在乎我們贏了不少獎金，因為我根本不知道
LCS是什麼東西。

Unfortunately I was too young to play at the LCS qualifier, so my team had
to go without me. At this point my parents were still trying to push me
back into school, and I honestly had no expectations of my team qualifying,
so I was still in a weird stage of my life not knowing what to do and what
would happen next.
不幸的是我太年輕而無法參加LCS資格賽， 所以我的隊伍必須在沒有我的狀況下參賽
。這時候我父母還是努力的想讓我回去上學，而且老實說我也不期望我的隊伍能夠晉
級，所以當時我依然相當徬徨，不知道該做什麼、接下來會發生什麼事。

Somehow my team pulled off an amazingly strong showing and qualified for the
LCS, beating out the favorites. I was obviously really happy about that, but
still didn't really have a clear idea what it meant to be in the LCS. After
my team had lost the first 3 weeks straight, I finally turned 17 and was
able to play with my old team.
然而我的隊伍展現出了非常精采的表現，成功擊敗了熱門強隊晉級LCS。 我當時確實
很高興，但是我還是沒有很瞭解參加LCS代表什麼樣的意義。 在我的隊伍前三週連敗
之後，我終於滿17歲並且再次可以跟我的老隊友們並肩作戰。

In our first victory I got a pentakill, and all of a sudden I had all this
hype around me, but all I really wanted was to stay under the radar. I
didn't want the fame, I didn't want to be interviewed. I didn't want people
from back home knowing what I was doing, because I had this belief that
gaming was frowned upon in society. Riot asked ESL every week to get
interviews with me but I always declined, I just didn't want the spotlight.
在我們的第一場勝利中我拿到了一個pentakill， 然後瞬間就有許多的讚揚圍繞著我
，可是我其實只想要躲著不被人發現。我不想要名氣，我不想要被採訪，我不想要我
家鄉那些人知道我在做什麼，因為我覺得玩遊戲在社會上是不被認同的行為。Riot每
週都請ESL訪問我，但是我總是拒絕，我就是不想要鎂光燈聚焦在我身上。

At this point a lot of people starting looking up to me and writing me on
various fan pages. I don't want to sound mean, but I thought all my fans were
fools. Who would want to be a fan of a nerd, a dropout who was bullied in
school. I never really talked to many of the other players in the first split
because I was so shy and insecure. I was constantly scared that if I said
something wrong they would all bully me, since I was the young, awkward
skinny kid. What I soon came to realize was that all the players and staff at
ESL/Riot were extremely nice and I had nothing to worry about.
這時候很多人開始關注我，在一些粉絲頁上寫我相關的事情。我不想說的很難聽，但
我當時覺得我的粉絲們全都是白痴。誰會想成為一個老是被欺負的輟學怪咖的粉絲阿
？在第一個賽季我幾乎沒有跟其他玩家說過話，因為我當時非常害羞而且缺乏安全感
。我當時一直害怕要是我說了什麼不對的話他們就會開始欺負我，當時我還只是個年
輕、有點奇怪的瘦瘦的小孩。不過我很快就了解到其實其他玩家和ESL/Riot的工作人
員們人都很好，我根本不需要擔心。

Even though I didn't have great success in Season 3 LCS, I grew more as an
individual and a person that I have done the remaining 16 years of my life.
When I left Europe to join TSM, I was not the shy kid, shaking and
stuttering in his first interview on stage. I wasn't the kid who dodged all
interviews and ran away from conflict. I wasn't always wearing long shirts
because I was insecure about my weight and arms.
雖然我在LCS S3並沒有什麼很大的成就，但是比起我前16年的人生，我成長的更多，
成為一個更獨立的人。當我離開歐洲加盟TSM，我不再是那個害羞、 搖搖晃晃而且在
第一次受訪時還結巴的瘦小孩了；我不再是那個迴避每個採訪而且不敢面對衝突的孩
子了。我不再因為對於我的體重和手臂有不安全感而總是穿長袖了。

I was a changed person, and I still am. I have never been as happy as I am
right now in life, and I want to thank everyone I've met and that has been
in my life the past year. I especially want to thank Deficio.. If it wasn't
for him I wouldn't be here today, he opened himself up to me, and I strived
to become confident like he was. I wish him all the best luck in the future.
我已經改變了，我人生從來沒有像現在一樣這麼開心，我想要感謝我人生中遇過的每
個人。特別是我想感謝Deficio。 如果不是他，我不會有今天，他對我敞開心房，然
後我努力的變得跟他一樣具有自信，我希望他人生未來一切順利。

I am proud to say that I can share all this information about my past,
knowing it would not hurt me if people try to use it against me. I am sorry
for any grammar mistakes, I've been writing this on my phone, so it's
extremely messy. Sorry for the super long read, I just wanted you guys to
know that if you are in a shitty place in life, hold on... Things get
better!
現在我可以很驕傲的說，我可以把我過去這些事情說出來，即使有人想用這些事來傷
害我，我也不會被傷害到。很抱歉這篇文章有很多文法錯誤，我是用手機寫的所以很
亂。很抱歉寫這麼長，我只是想讓各位知道，如果你現在人生過的很糟...撐住， 事
情總會好轉的！


TSM! ~

--
※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc)
◆ From: 1.34.221.231
推 epephanylo  :最近他被拿來跟FAKER比的事鬧得有點大呀 XDDDDD
Bjergsen自己有回，他覺得montecristo說的完全正確阿xD
推 diefish5566 :霸凌舉世皆有啊...辛苦了
推 imdai       :又是個被霸凌的小孩...Q_Q 加油 現在很棒了
※ 編輯: kaneggyy        來自: 1.34.221.231         (02/11 21:58)
推 z83420123   :跟Faker比?
推 rogerxji6   :推
推 stme3344    :這是感人故事吧
推 hoe1101     :難怪tsm這麼受歡迎
推 tutufish    :怎麼個比法@@
Monte認為Faker >> Bjergsen（這點Bjerg他本人也同意
其他有人說是Faker在韓國就像是Bjergsen在北美
都是殺遍整個地區沒對手
※ 編輯: kaneggyy        來自: 1.34.221.231         (02/11 22:02)
推 catatonic   :推推
推 Homeparty   :感人故事+1
推 hoe1101     :s3我覺得mancloud還不錯，但最近頗慘
推 tutufish    :長相我個人覺得鼻爾森大贏XD
推 CoLLaps     :讚
推 justastupid :太可憐了
推 SHOYO       :QAQ  加油啊 繼續發光發熱!!
推 yoyoyo916   :感人QQ
推 kiddlau     :TSM TSM
推 qooiscool   :統神~ 幼年生活:吃>長大>再吃>再長大
推 enigma4052  :統神不是之前瘦瘦的嗎
推 izacc       :"Deficio"best support EU "Travis"best support NA
推 iamalam2005 :樓上你是在養電子雞嗎
推 ilris       :終於有人翻了:p
推 epephanylo  :i軟你的呆萌呢!!!?
推 BigCockman  :好險他是生長在國外
推 SunRoy      :淚推Q_Q
推 justastupid :很難不同意吧....S3冠軍又幾乎壓線
推 doyouknowhow:可以綜藝一點不同意 在S4證明
推 Istari      :美國老師真的很爛
推 an138       :長那麼帥 打這種文章好沒說服力
推 Gaujing     :他在外國人審美觀裏頭不帥啊 太瘦
→ Homeparty   :By the way 他是歐洲丹麥人
推 mimi1020b   :台灣教育真的很爛
→ an138       :等到他20歲以後他就知道他那張帥臉多好用了
推 z83420123   :他是丹麥人 所以乾美國老師甚麼事XDD
→ z83420123   :選手有信心很好啊XD至於Monte?美國賽評不吹美國隊伍
推 shoube      :淚推QQ
→ z83420123   :難道要發文說美國隊伍都超爛 其他區域躺著打嗎XD
monte我印象以來從來沒吹過美國隊伍阿...
他一向都是說韓國強
※ 編輯: kaneggyy        來自: 1.34.221.231         (02/11 22:27)
推 epephanylo  :monte是韓國賽評吧 XDDD
推 coolyao     :MONTE是吹捧FAKER吧0.0
推 hell010135  :美國人真的超神奇.不僅種族歧視連同族都能歧視
→ epephanylo  :有點神奇 Fnatic的SUB名單是LAMIA跟PUSZU....
→ z83420123   :媽的= =眼殘看成Bjer>>Faker  WTF
→ z83420123   :SRY 拉 我眼殘ORZ
推 risk0717    :樓上原本大家是說比爾森跟faker一樣打爆地區賽裡的
→ risk0717    :結果monte以為大家是說faker=比爾森,所以才po文
推 izacc       :monte的推特就是在對 比較faker和漢堡森的人PO的
→ w3160828    :文章都說他是歐洲人還在跳針美國
推 jimmy5680   :淚推，感人勵志故事
→ izacc       :其實沒什麼以為不以為的問題 他很清楚兩者的差異
推 Germany169  :Bjergsen是丹麥人吧
推 Heedictator :好慘
推 lhceric123  :TSMTSM
推 YunHung46   :感人!
推 iljapan61   :好長
推 way0830     :Q_Q
推 holebro     :Bjergsen我愛你!!
推 Pellaeon    :LOL幫助被霸凌小孩找出另一片天!
推 frank123ya  :BJ森說自己粉絲那段也太溫馨好笑XD
推 vvvv0o0vvvv :胖虎挖角鼻爾森同時也帶給她快樂
推 Germany169  :                          真愛
推 SlamKai     :QQ
推 lamao       :不得不推
推 Xreay       :頗有感觸
推 Heedictator :推一下胖虎
推 boy830527   :長這麼帥說被霸凌太蝦
推 royalsage   :沒關係 胖虎會保護你
推 Ixtli       :還是歐美最有趣(期待日本
推 Moshiba     :很真實的故事,很高興能看到比爾森走出來在舞台發光
推 jameschen007:有些選手真的多虧有貴人幫忙 像是DL
推 palette7934 :Q_Q
推 linaslan    :有洋蔥 推與飛客較勁一下！
推 BrightPeak  :@boy830527 國外的審美觀跟台灣不一樣
推 catclan     :推翻議
→ catclan     :*譯
推 BoatLord    :霸凌全世界都有阿 排除異己乃生物本能
→ BrightPeak  :真羨慕 想起小時候被欺負 我第一件事情就是反抗XD
→ BrightPeak  :搞得自己沒朋友 也沒人喜歡接近我
→ BrightPeak  :也是線上遊戲讓我感受自己被需要 而且有人會支持自己
→ BrightPeak  :不過網友終究只是網友 唉....
推 evan700607  :所以他宅對遊戲了  不然不能破繭而出
推 AloRaiVet   :別說了  統神高中時,同學被嗆 他一個頂好幾個~
→ AloRaiVet   :這故事是他有次打LOL,遇到老朋友,朋友爆料的
噓 lifehappy   :結果xj9被riot霸凌
推 belial94    :好勵志，推一個又帥又強