[轉載] C羅自傳《Moments》（１３）
轉載自：紅魔曼聯中文球迷論壇 www.manut.com.cn
http://www.manutd.com.cn/forum/thread-71827-1-1.html
父親的去世
我一直非常愛我的父親 Dinis Aveiro。不幸的是，我再也見不到他了，但是我還是
感到他離我很近。
他一直活在我的心中，不管我在做什麼，不管我身在何處。始終有那麼多關於他美好
的回憶。因為他對於我成為一名足球運動員發揮了重要的作用，作為一個人，作為一個男
人。他的確是塑造我今天成就的人之一。
他從來不掩飾他對我的自豪和驕傲。即便是當我在安德瑞哈踢球的時候，他在那個球
場當設備技術人員。他每天都會跟別人說我在比賽裡面的表現。如果我打進一個進球。我
就知道我會在進家門的時候獲得一個小小的驚喜，他點上蠟燭，拿來蛋糕，還有很多好東
西，我們來一個家庭慶祝。
我父親跟我經常在一起，他看我訓練，給我建議，我們一起吃午飯。這就是一天我們
要做的事情。當別人說我好的時候，他就不說話，非常高興，興奮，自豪。但是如果有人
說我的不是，他就馬上言辭激烈的辯解。他的朋友們，非常瞭解他，有時候也會拿我表現
不好的比賽來取笑他。很自然，他回擊：他辯駁，瘋狂，他不允許別人批評我。如果我在
下一場比賽進球，或者有好的表現，他第二天清早就拿著厚厚的報紙發給他的朋友們，當
成是復仇，當然是沒有惡意的。不管什麼情況，他都不會停止。看我踢球讓他熱情洋溢，
他跟我共享我對足球的熱情。
在聯賽裡面，安德瑞哈（Andorinha）是比較弱的球隊。當我們跟其他強隊，例如︰
Maritimo、Machico 或者 Camara de Lobos 打比賽的時候，我們當然會被進很多球。我
記得有一次我不想參加一場比賽，因為我早就知道了比賽的結果，可能是15-0。「我去那
裡於事無補。」我想。當我父親發現我不在更衣室的時候，毫無猶豫，他衝回家裡，告訴
我，只有弱者才會放棄。他鼓勵我，把我帶去球場，讓我上場。我們當然失敗了。但是我
也被我父親的熱情感染。他是讓我不放棄足球的功臣。我的母親，也對足球很熱情，常常
告訴我父親，讓他把我帶到他工作的俱樂部。漸漸的我學會了什麼叫做負責任。
本菲卡是我父親和弟弟們喜愛的球隊。但是他的自豪沒有因此而減弱。看到他的兒子
，土生土長的馬德拉人，在葡萄牙的大陸一家俱樂部踢球，足以讓他感到高興了。當我簽
約曼聯的時候，他高興到了極點。他一次一次的陪伴我，支持我，鼓勵我直到他病倒了。
我們會為我們深愛的人做任何事情，但是不幸的是他的命運就是這麼定的。
2005年9月6日
我當時在莫斯科，我跟葡萄牙國家隊跟俄羅斯踢一場2006年世界盃的資格賽。那天是
週二。
我被斯科拉裡叫去的時候，正在我的房間裡看電影。我到了他的房間，菲戈，那時他
是我們國家隊的隊長，早就已經在哪裡了。我感覺很奇怪，但是我幾乎不敢相信他們帶給
我父親去世的消息。對我來說震驚太大了。我什麼都不知道了。我的頭就像突然洩了氣的
氣球。我無法思考，一切都是茫然。
「克裡斯蒂亞諾，如果你想回去，我們馬上給你訂好航班，你可以回去。」斯科拉裡
說。「不，不，我想留在這裡，我明天想打比賽。」我回答著。這些是第一句進入我腦子
裡的話。但是是真誠的真心的。我告訴他他可以相信我，告訴他，會有一些糟糕的時間，
但是這場比賽他可以依賴我，這也是我唯一想做的，成為比賽的一部分。我想這也是正確
的。我做這個決定是為了我自己，不是任何人，又或者也是因為任何人。我想不出更好或
者更壞的決定。我不知道我不回去會不會幫到任何人或者傷害任何人，或者其他的。當時
我唯一的想法就是在莫斯科跟俄羅斯打比賽。「我將為了我父親的榮譽而戰。我是為了他
而打比賽。」而且我也做到了。
在比賽的當天，更衣室，甚至是熱身的時候氣氛是沉重，奇怪。我隊友的表現也比較
不一樣。他們很沉靜，壓抑，悲傷，他們不知道該怎麼做才好。我走向他們，跟他們說，
他們必須要放鬆，必須要表現的自然。他們要像平常一樣。如果因為我，他們表現不尋常
的話是不對的。我鼓勵他們笑起來。我覺得我必須激勵他們，提高他們的士氣。而且我也
像平常一樣做了該做的事情。任何人知道我在更衣室裡我都會玩球，跟幾個隊友。所以第
一次我開始故意這樣做，是讓我減少壓力，讓我的隊友相信他們要恢復到往常的表現。
對我來說，這是非常困難的。我的父親在我的腦海中。我一直努力的進球。每場比賽
都是如此。但是這次，實際來說，太特別了。
斯科拉裡，我也曾經說過，在如此困難的時期發揮了非常重要的作用。實際上，在這
場比賽訓練的時候他允許我可以回到倫敦去陪我病重的父親。「不要忘記，家庭永遠是第
一位的，然後才是足球。」他告訴我。我拒絕了。就在這個時候我跟斯科拉裡的友情也更
加的深厚了。當他把他父親去世的故事告訴我後，我們兩個相擁而泣。他的話很溫暖。他
理解我，支持我，跟我力量。
上帝讓我父親離開。我對他的離去很悲傷，但是這就是生活。人總會死亡，每個人都
會如此，或早或晚。但是當這個人是家裡的人時，一切就變的很複雜了。很多次，當我在
家裡的時候，我感覺到他的存在，「不要那麼做，不要，不要這樣，這不適合你。」有時
我聽到他給我的意見。他一直在我的左右。
這是非常艱難的時刻。非常艱難。但是我們必須走自己的路，我們不能停下來。我的
兄弟姐妹都會感覺到生活的空虛。我跟我的家庭都無法彌補這麼巨大的損失。我們都深愛
著不在我們身邊的人，但是我們必須勇敢，必須向前看。生活是那麼的短暫，讓你無法沉
浸在不好，壓抑和可怕的想法裡面。因為這樣我也不想對死亡展開深入的討論。
有一天，我跟我的母親聊天，突然，她告訴我讓我毫無防備，「有一天，我會離開我
的孩子們，我會看不到他們，不能再保護他們。」我的雙眼充滿淚水。為什麼，為什麼我
的父母會在生命中的某個時刻這麼說？我馬上轉換了話題，沒有任何猶豫，我不喜歡這樣
，這樣讓我感覺很沮喪。所以我深信我們要好好的利用生活帶給我們的東西，享受生活，
因為生活太短暫了，所以我相信人們在死後會有不一樣的生命。或許我們再也無法相見，
但是我們一直有相見的信念。今天我們生活在這個世界裡面，我們要好好的享受現在的生
活。我們要歡迎一切發生在我們身上的事情，而不必考慮多麼深奧的道理。
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My father's death
I loved and still love my father, Dinis Aveiro, very much. Unfortunately, I
cannot enjoy his physical presence any more, but I always feel him close to
me.
He is alive in my mind, whatever I do, wherever I am. I keep many fond
memories of him, because he was fundamental to my development as a football
player, as a person, as a man. He was truly one of the people responsible
for what I am today.
The pride he had in me was all too evident and obvious, even when I first
started to kick the ball in Andorinha, where he worked as an equipment
technician. Not a day went by when he did not tell everyone, in detail,
everything I had done, in every game. Whenever I scored a goal, I knew that
when I arrived home I would have a surprise waiting for me: he brought me
candy, cakes, many sweet treats, we had a great family celebration.
My father and I were always very close. He watched my training sessions,
gave me advice, and we had lunches together. This was a daily routine. When
he realized everyone around him was praising me, he would not utter a word,
completely delighted, excited, and very proud. But if anyone dared to make
a less positive comment about me, he would argue strongly in my defense. His
friends, who knew him well, would take the opportunity of a not-so-good game
to tease him.
Obviously, he reacted: he argued, he got mad, and he never allowed anyone to
criticize me. If I gave a good performance in the next game, or scored a goal,
he went there the next day with a huge pile of newspapers in his hands, which
he had bought very early in the morning, to give one to each of his friends,
like a small revenge, but without malice. He would never shut up, whatever
the circumstances. Watching me play was his passion, and he felt deeply
joyful for sharing my passion for football.
Andorinha was one of the weakest teams in the championship, and when we
played against stronger clubs, like Maritimo, Machico or Camara de Lobos,
defeat was invariably certain and by many goals. I remember one time that
I decided I did not want to play in a certain game because I already knew
we were going to lose, probably some 15-0. "What am I going to do there?"
I thought. When my father found out I was not in the dressing room, he did
not hesitate. He headed home, talked to me, explaining that only the weak
give up. And so he encouraged me, took me to the ground and I did play. We
were thrashed, of course, but I was infected with my father's enthusiasm.
He was ultimately one of the people responsible for my not giving up football.
My mother, who was also passionate about football, repeatedly insisted to my
father that he should take me to the club where he worked. Gradually, I
learned responsibility.
Benfica was always the club of my father's heart – and my brother's. But
his pride was not diminished by that. To see his son, a native of Madeira,
in a Portuguese mainland club, was motive enough to fill him with joy. When
I signed for United, he was totally ecstatic. He was with me many, many
times, accompanying me, supporting me, encouraging me, right until the moment
when he fell ill. We do anything for the people we love. But unfortunately
his fate was already determined.
September 6th, 2005
I was in Moscow, with the Portuguese national team, which was playing a 2006
world cup qualification match on the next day, against Russia. It was Tuesday.
I was in my room, watching a movie, when I was summoned by Luiz Felipe
Scolari. I went to his room, where Luis Figo, at the time the captain of the
Portuguese team, was already waiting. I thought it was odd, but I could never
have imagined that the news they had for me was about my father's death. It
was a shock for me. I had no feeling. My head felt like a balloon that was
suddenly deflated. I could not think about anything. Absolutely nothing.
"Cristiano, if you want to, go. We will make your flight reservations
immediately, and you can go to your family," Luiz Felipe Scolari told me.
"No, no, I want to stay here, and I want to play tomorrow," I answered.
Those were the first words that sprung to my mind. But they were honest
and sincere words. I told him he could rely on me. I told him there were
going to be tough moments, but that he could count on me for that game,
and that my only wish was to be part of the game. I thought it was the right
thing to do. I took that decision for myself, not for other people, or
because of other people. I did not wonder if my decision would be better or
worse for me, I did not wonder if my presence near my father would help or
hurt anyone, or anything. The only thought that crossed my mind was about
staying in Moscow and playing against Russia. "I am going to play a game in
honor of my father, I will play for him." And so I did.
On the day of the match, the mood in the dressing room, and even during the
warm-up period, was heavy, it was strange. The behavior of my team-mates was
not normal. They were very quiet, distressed, withdrawn, not knowing what
their correct attitude should be. I went to them and explained that they had
to act naturally; that they had to be themselves, that it made no sense to
alter their behavior just because of me. I encouraged them to laugh. I felt
the need to stimulate them, to lift their spirits. I tried to do exactly the
same things that I always did, precisely to put across that message. Anyone
who knows Cristiano Ronaldo knows that in the dressing room I am always
playing with the ball. Myself and a few other team-mates. For the first time
that was not happening so, to relieve the tension and to show them that the
team's behavior should be the same as usual, I started to play with the ball.
It is undeniable that it was hard for me. Very hard. My father filled my
thoughts. It is true I tried to score a goal. I try to in every game I play.
But this goal would, in fact, be different, it would be special.
Luiz Felipe Scolari, as I have already mentioned, played a decisive role in
this moment that was so difficult for me. In fact, even during the training
for this game, he gave me permission to go back to London to be near my
father, who was then seriously ill. "Never forget that family comes first,
and only then comes football," he told me. I refused. At that exact moment
my friendship with Scolari began to strengthen. We both cried when he told
the story of how his own father died. He was warm, he understood me, he
comforted me, he gave me strength.
God wanted my father to go. I felt outraged by his physical disappearance,
but that is just the way life is. People die every day, and we know that all
of us, one day, will disappear. But when it is a person in our family,
everything is much more complicated. Many times, when I am at home, I feel
his presence. I cannot explain it, but sometimes I feel that I hear his
advice: "Don't do that, don't go that, don't go that way, that is not the
most suitable for you." He is always by my side.
Those were very rough times for me. It is still rough. But we must all follow
our own path, we cannot stop. My brothers and sisters and I still feel a void
in our lives. Neither, I nor my family, have yet been able to completely
overcome this loss. We still love someone who is not physically present, but
we must be strong, and keep moving forward. Life is too short to spend with
negative, depressive and morbid thoughts. For this reason I do not like to
engage in deep conversations about death.
One day I was talking with my mother when, all of a sudden, she made a
declaration that caught me completely off guard: "Some day I am going to
leave my children, and I will never be able to see them and protect them
again." Tears filled my eyes. Why must parents talk about this, after a
certain point in their lives? I had to change the subject immediately for,
without a doubt, I don't like it, and it makes me feel extremely
uncomfortable. Therefore, I believe in the need to make good use of what
life has to give us and to enjoy it fully, for it is short. I believe that
there may be some kind of life beyond death. We may never meet directly,
but that dream will become infinite. Today we are here, in this world, and
we should enjoy life to the full. We should welcome everything that comes
to us. Without the need of deep philosophical thoughts.
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★ ╔╦═╮╔╮ ╭╔╮ ╭╔╦═╮ ╔╮╔╮╭╦═╮╔╮═╮ ☆
☆ ╠╬╦╯╠╣ ║╠╣ ║╠╣ ║ ╠╣╠╣╠╬═╣╠╣ ║ ★
★ ╰╝╰╯╰╝═╯╰╝═╯╚╯═╯ ╰╰╯╯╰╝ ╰╰╝ ╰ ☆ ☆ SCORING MACHINE︰ Ruud van Nistelrooy ★
╔╮═╮╭╦╦╮╭╦═╮╭╦╦╮╔╦═╮╔╮ ╔╦═╮╭╦═╭═╦╮╮ ╔╮
╠╣ ║ ╠╣ ╚╩╦╮ ╠╣ ╠╬╣ ╠╣ ╠╬╦╯╠╣ ║ ╠╣╚═╬╣
╰╝ ╰╰╩╩╯╰═╩╝ ╚╝ ╚╩═╯╰╩═╯╰╝╰╯╰╩═╯═╩╯╰═╩╝
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