[專欄] 歐登阿伯，蜜月期結束了喔 啾咪^.<

[celestial318 (強尼)]

http://0rz.tw/mDp29


There is somebody notably absent from this week's Rookie Rankings, kind of like

how it seemed wrong that Jack Nicholson wasn't occupying his usual front row

seat at the Oscars last month.


最近忙著戰AI和活塞的各位可能沒有注意到，在最新一期的新秀譜上少了一位舉足輕重的

人物。這感覺就好像影帝Jack Nicholson在上個月奧斯卡頒獎典禮時沒有坐在他以往的前

排位置，以及和冥燈下了同一個選項卻還能賺進P幣一樣的不可思議。


He's not in the top 10. He's not in the next 10. But his plight is being

bantered about by the talking heads on TNT, NBA TV and ESPN's 1st and 10.


前十名內沒有他或許不意外，但20名內還找不到他的名字就有點說不過去了。值得慶幸的

是，他並沒有被大家遺忘。一眾比糗爺專業許多的名嘴早已砲聲隆隆，若將評論的pH值設

為x，很輕易的便可得證x→-∞。


Greg Oden's honeymoon has officially ended. He had us with the goofy grin,

broad shoulders and the flashes of brilliance, but in today's societal habits

of trying to project the future rather than patiently allowing it to unfold,

Oden has the doubters doubting.


□ [公告] 狀元歐登的蜜月期已正式結束。我們都喜歡他那與年齡不符，好傻又好天真的

微笑，那堅若磐石的厚實肩膀，以及他在比賽中驚鴻一瞥的精采表現。但這個社會是很殘

酷的，做的要死要活不代表data就多，而有在持續觀察他的人們也漸漸失去耐性，懷疑他

是繼糖果人、奶油手之後的第三個水貨狀元—玻璃腿。


Microfracture surgery on his right knee in his first year wiped out his entire

2007-08 campaign. Back for '08-09 as a second-year rookie, Oden came down with

a foot injury in his first game as a pro which cost him two weeks of action.

Then, four days after perhaps the finest outing of his young career (17 points

, 12 rebounds and six blocks in a win against the Knicks), Oden bumped knees

with Golden State's Corey Maggette.


2007年九月所動的膝蓋內關節軟骨手術讓這位狀元的新人球季就此報銷，讓許多FB玩家是

幹聲連連。幸好操刀的並非魔術隊醫，下一個球季這位狀元便順利的回到球場上。但很不

幸的在付出的首場便對上了ptt人氣最旺的湖人隊，在比賽中扭傷了腳，又賺到了兩個禮拜

的假。Oden對於他的受傷解釋是: 為什麼泥門都要欺負我(哭)，聲稱是踩到了漁夫的腳才

因此而受傷的，而漁夫也對此做出回應:

爆 DerekFisher  □  [問卦] 有沒有阿伯打球都超會牽拖的八卦?

再度回到場上後，在對尼克隊的比賽中他終於繳出了生涯代表作: 17分、12籃板、6火鍋的

成績，證明他和兩位前輩絕不相同。但造化弄人，4天後在比賽中，他再度與只會得分和

衝數據的Maggette膝蓋相撞而受傷。


The initial diagnosis was a bone bruise on his left knee. He was going to miss

the T-Mobile Rookie Challenge and the ballyhooed national matchup with emerging

superstar Kevin Durant, who he was picked one spot before in 2007. But with the

Blazers playing games that counted towards a playoff berth after the All-Star

break, nobody minded much that Oden sat out.


最初的診斷認為只是左膝蓋上的一個瘀青，不過他也因此錯失了這次的新秀挑戰賽以及

與雷帝同台較勁的機會。不過明星賽過後缺了Oden的拓荒者表現不降反升，甚至還有機會

搶到季後賽的門票，這位阿伯就漸漸的被世人所遺忘了...


Then the bone bruise became a bone chip and the 7-foot, 285-pound Oden was

going to miss a couple of weeks. Then the bone chip didn't heal as expected and

the couple of weeks became closer to a month.


後來卻發現那個瘀青並不單純，膝蓋中其實有了一塊碎骨，而使得這位堂堂7呎重達285磅

的男子漢必須休兵幾個星期。治療過後傷勢的復元又不如預期中的樂觀，於是單位又從星

期變成了月。在大喊 "庸醫誤我!" 之餘，Oden在夢中也看見了Hill、Penny、TMac等人紛

紛轉過身來對他微笑。


The same guy who was quoted on the cover of ESPN The Magazine saying, "I hope I

can get a bunch of championships -- like 15," now has people wondering whether

he can even stay healthy for 15 weeks at a time.


這位曾經上過ESPN雜誌封面的阿伯當時狂言 "林北拿個一打冠軍該不是問題，不，好像太

少了，那加碼到15個好了。" 結果現在人們都覺得你麥唬爛，只要你能15個星期內都沒受

傷McMillan就要高潮了。


The timing couldn't be worse for the Blazers, who are currently the No. 6 seed

in the tight-as-Spandex West. On one had, Portland is only a game behind

Houston for the No. 3 seed. On the other, they're just 3 1/2 games from being

out of the playoff picture entirely.


雖然不意外，但Oden的受傷在此時對拓荒者來說仍是個噩耗。在兵荒馬亂的西區他們目前

暫為第六種子。雖然當下他們只差一場勝差就能夠攔下火箭成為第三種子，但同樣的距離

跌出季後賽也只差了3.5場勝差。


But before Oden is labeled a bust, let's all catch our breath for a second. He

is just 21 years old. He may be injury prone so far, but nobody is immune.

Durant is the league's fourth-leading scorer and has people wanting to rewrite

history, having Portland take him No. 1 in '07. But Durant isn't even playing

right now either because of a severely sprained ankle.


但在正式將他接上"水貨"的標籤前，我們必須先冷靜下來仔細的分析他的情況。首先，在

經過FBI的秘密調查後發現他的實際年齡真的只有21歲! 雖然他脆弱的好像是用沙子堆成的

，但你必須了解，沒有人是天下無敵的。就算有，老馬也可以讓你三回內橫屍路邊。在比

照雷帝現今的表現，馬後砲數之不清，但很巧的是，雷帝現在也正因嚴重扭傷的腳踝而在

家充電中。


Injuries happen in the game of basketball. Look at Tracy McGrady, Allen Iverson

, Carlos Boozer, Manu Ginobili, Tim Duncan, Gilbert Arenas, etc. This season's

injury report has read like an All-Star roster.


打球嘛，不受點傷是不可能的。攤開這季的傷兵名單: TMac、戰神、Boooooozer、鬼切、

石佛、0號瘋子等等...妖獸勒! 給我這種隊我隨便都嘛能拿冠軍。


Who's to say Oden has just been unlucky, rather than injury-prone?


大家都只是嘲笑他的玻璃腿，卻沒有人為他長嘆一句 "時不我予阿!"


Whatever he's been, he's no longer going to be a regular in the Rookie Rankings

-- at least for the time being. His 9.0 points, 7.2 rebounds and 1.1 blocks

averages pale in comparison to the one stat everybody is harping on these days

-- the 95 games, and counting, he's missed because of injury since he's come

into the league.


無論如何，我們短時間內是不會在新秀譜上看見他的大名了。至今平均9分、7.2籃板和

1.1阻攻的成績和其他人相比明顯尚未夠班。95這個數字，指的不是同病相憐為其長相所

苦的小皇帝，而是他自進聯盟以來因傷所缺陣的比賽次數，並且正在持續增加中。無論這

個數字最終為何，想必都會成為酸民們冷潮熱諷的數字。



==============================================================================



這篇短了些

因為這幾天我的腦力實在用盡了...

還有其實我是114 XD

看到同學跟學弟也來支持很感動 謝謝你們

週末我基本上是公休

我認為要正常翻譯新聞的話 板上臥虎藏龍很多人都做得到

希望我也能達到拋磚引玉的效果

謝謝大家的支持!




--
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◆ From: 140.114.99.95
※ 編輯: celestial318    來自: 140.114.99.95        (03/06 13:37)
推 freijaking:head
推 bakingss:neck
推 kenny1300175:推用心!!
推 nikekobe:用鄉民的口吻翻譯很屌耶!!!推~~~~~~~~~~~~~
推 jason78715:好文推推推
推 shiuanhong:114推
推 roudolf:他需要挺立+Ca
推 DemonRing:push
推 dscndg:有好笑
推 hellothisisy:庸醫誤我！
推 nomoregret:好笑推!!!
→ isaacp:中鋒三寶  糖果奶油玻璃腳
→ Fernandez05:不覺得好笑,對不起我認真了
推 SYNACK:不錯啦 有精闢到
推 airanfernee:笑點見仁見智　不論如何肯翻譯給大家我想就該給鼓勵
推 YamagiN:幹你老馬角色尊嚴路邊掉光不用錢
推 hllwolfkhan:是神燈啦~~~你打錯了~
推 MasterAsia:給認真翻譯的人加油 推
推 newseastar:114推倒
推 NanFong:推一個 加油啦
推 ntusimmon:好屌 鄉民式翻譯
推 ThreeNG:翻譯的超好笑的啦！(＞▽＜)
推 NorthernStar:penny hill等回頭微笑那邊還真是恐怖.....
推 paso:好~你~個~
推 ler23:推！
推 kuchibu:不好笑但很口語不錯
推 smallzch:推  好笑~
推 satisfac523:專業的鄉民翻譯推 這種文章才看的懂嘛！
推 rbull:推
推 Librajames:114推 讚啦！！
推 KennyKuo:我114漫畫屋待了七年推!!! 遇到知己了!!!
推 mea7211:有笑有推~
推 Loch:有酸但好笑便值得一推
推 slightwind:推啊,超有趣的翻譯!!
推 jaychiuptt:114推...梅竹有比賽翻外電就贏了XDDDD
推 can15air:有笑有推
推 paulnine:看到15週不受傷就高潮了我噴飯
推 PiLiPaLa:推
推 Nelson26:看完全部給個推 XDDDDDDD
推 sawang:推XD
推 etgohome:不推不行
推 Nelson26:哈哈~那ID DerekFisher是真有其人嗎XDDDDDDD
推 BrentRoy:天下的梗 幹你老馬阿XDDDD
推 Maxslack:推
推 twister527:快把他換到太陽或活塞 應該還有救@@~
→ tc89:這兩隊都有神醫啊!
推 v00001:15週不受傷就高潮XD
→ twister527:tc大 你這樣回 感覺我麼兩在唱雙簧 (趕快來活塞...)
推 kobePaul:推
→ tc89:我在幫活塞的神醫打廣告
→ tc89:如果因為神醫救好 又讓我們撿便宜何樂而不為 XD
推 zric:推一個
推 stoudemire31:15個星期沒受傷Mc就要高朝了~XDD
推 jjhome:推
推 henry12:有笑有推+用心
推 Whilsper:好看～推！
推 eyeyey531:爆 DerekFisher  □  [問卦] 有沒有阿伯打球都超會牽拖
→ eyeyey531:完全戳重我的點
推 rhetts:原文與翻譯不符...XD
推 jonestem:"只要你能15個星期內都沒受傷McMillan就要高潮了" <- 這
→ jonestem:句超好笑 XD
推 sun9:這篇翻得超好笑的~~~以後靠你了~~
推 kelvinchang:怎麼在這裡也有幹你老馬XD
推 xoxoxox:XD
推 ZUNDERTAKER:翻的不錯喔XD
推 garyc1225:用心耶  大推!!!!!
推 ji3g45j0806:強尼伯依推XD
推 fredd:但這個社會是很殘酷的，做的要死要活不代表data就多
→ fredd:中肯到炸掉耶
推 js2004nt:用心推~
推 mycuba:辛苦了 翻的不錯啦~
推 jnps:    他之前一場球都沒打時 還進聯盟十大中鋒................
推 wang1209:114友情推~~而且真的超好笑XD
推 DM1984:有笑有推
推 bjoke:太好笑啦~ 要推  絕對要推
推 arai12367:66