推 yp1031:剛進來這,以為艾拉用英文留言,還在想艾拉何時英文這麼好了 01/10 14:59
推 cj950161:我也嚇到了~以為Ella英文突飛猛進呢~哈 01/10 18:04
推 Frances912:有點吃力的看到後面才發現....有翻譯....= = 01/10 22:42
Ella
文章日期： 2010/1/9 下午 11:06:05
Few wishes by KJ：＜Life is full of surprise.＞
It still amuses me that people are actually going to see through the scenes
to my inner world of thinking. I am not good - in fact very bad - at
presenting myself to people, therefore usually people take me to its extreme,
either hate me or love me. Many would think I am a talented young boy who
doesnt treasure my gifts, or some would think I am living in my own fantasies
being fake to people... Doesn’t matter. Recently one of my friends said we
are defined by the people around us, but I think its more important how we
answer to our souls.
I am an intentionalist. I believe its how we answer to ourselves at the end
of the day that matters. consequentially I may have hurt a lot of people back
many times. Well, maybe sometimes i meant them. =P perhaps out of frustration
or immaturity. yet at least I hope i didnt want to. Mix feelings of strong
personality, confusion, lack of direction, immaturity in ideas, (parental)
influences may be good excuses? Ha-ha... self-evaluating my teenage life is
painful, there were so many undesirable decisions that i have made. I must
say I hated how I dealt with people but yet I also treasure these mistakes
for bringing myself to who I am. grudges.
I hate myself for being crowned as "talented" or even "genius" which firstly,
are not true; and secondly, destroyed my childhood. Implicated by Chinese
astrology, I believe everyone has his own path and destiny. Imagine what
would happen if my mum didnt register me and my siblings with that piano
teacher, but instead took me to a math class and my father trained me like he
did to my piano - 2 hours at lunch and perhaps a little more at night. then
entering me to competitions and kept crowning achievements. To the extend
that it becomes the only topic for 10 years on the dining table. now you may
say I am superficial and dont understand what competitions have brought to
me. but if you do the same competition at February and March for 10 years in
your childhood, then you may have the sympathy.
Competitions did give me motivation. it was very cool and satisfying to
achieve some little thing when you were 8. But it also subtly forced me to
play the music for the wrong reason. I must say I am also fortunate to have
been in the competitions. They brought me to realize its meaningless
destruction to ones music earlier than other people. Ha-ha at least my father
is obsessed with it, still.
So after years of inner conflict, I have realized it doesnt matter who we
are, but what we are. Maybe that poor guy is destined to steal those 30
bucks. I am destined to be dumped by the same person 3 times in a row; Mozart
was destined to be the greatest prodigy ever. Yet I do believe in fairness
out of all these chaos. I am convinced that under the unlimited varieties in
this world, God dont simply judge us by whether we explicitly "put our faith
in God" nor do the "right" thing. But I believe he looks at how we grow upon
our sincerity. and be true to ourselves as human being.
I dont believe in Heaven. Because I believe we are all living in Heaven
already. We are just blindfolded by our immature human nature, too foolish to
admit.
Hope those who have watched KJ like it. You guys are lucky as I havent
watched it myself.
來自KJ的一些祝福: 「生命是充滿著驚喜」
對於人們真的將藉由觀影來「看」到我內在世界的思考這件事，仍令我感到不可思議。我
並不擅於，事實上是很差勁地，在人群前呈現自己，因此通常別人對我的看法很兩極，不
是恨我就是愛我。許多人會覺得我是個有天賦的年輕人，卻不怎麼珍惜自己的才華，或某
些人會認為我只是活在自己的幻想裡，對人很虛假......無所謂。最近一位朋友說我們是
被身邊的人所定義的，但我認為，更重要的是我們怎麼回應自己的靈魂。
So, one may be a billionaire, artist, janitor, lawyer, doctor, beggar,
whatever. For me it depends great deal on personality, background and
education. somebody might just got bad luck and achieve nothing in his life,
but just another classmate in your F1 class may be the most successful man.
Isnt God unfair? I was confused into tears in front of the camera because of
that in that interview in Czech 8 years ago. I remember right before I went
to Czech I saw a bunch of people chasing after a thief on the street in
Bangkok. The poor thief was half naked, skinny like me (oh well), climbing up
one of the oldest buildings trying to escape from justice perhaps because he
stole 30 bucks for food. I was literally shocked. one hour earlier I was
practicing the piano and I never knew that there is so much tragedy,
unfairness and sadness in this world. I simply didnt understand it.
我是個意圖主義者(intentionalist)。我相信在生命的最終我們如何回應自己才是最重要
的。因此我或許曾傷害過許多人許多次。或許有時我是故意的 =P 出於憤怒或不成熟。但
至少我「希望」我並不想這麼做。個性強烈、混亂、失去方向、想法不成熟、「父母」的
影響，或許都是好的藉口？哈哈......分析自己的青少年生涯是痛苦的，因為我曾做出許
多不討好的決定。我必須說我厭惡自己對待別人的方式，但我也很珍惜這些錯誤，是它們
幫助我成為自己。
翻譯者：altina & Tzuting H
我痛恨自己被冠上「有天賦」，甚至「天才」。首先，這並不是真的；其次，它摧毀我的
童年。就像中國人所謂的命理，我相信每個人都有自己的路及命運。試想，如果母親並沒
帶我和兄妹去跟那位鋼琴老師學琴，而是帶我去上數學班，而父親訓練我的數學像他訓練
我彈鋼琴一樣—午時2小時，晚上或許再多一點，之後讓我參加比賽且繼續獲得更多成就
，甚至變成十年飯桌上唯一的話題。現在你或許會說我很膚淺，不了解比賽給予我的；但
如果你每年二月和三月參加同樣的比賽，這樣的生活，在你的童年持續個十年，或許你就
會有這份同情。
比賽的確帶給我動力。當你八歲能獲得某些小東西是很酷、很有成就的，但也隱約逼著
我為了錯誤的理由演奏音樂。諸多的比賽，讓我比別人更早領悟到比賽毫無意義地摧毀一
個人的音樂。哈哈，不過，我的父親仍舊對比賽很著迷。
一個人有可能是億萬富翁、藝術家、守衛、律師、醫生、乞丐等等。對我來說，這有很
大的部分取決於個性、成長背景以及教育環境。有的人就是很不幸，在他的生命裡什麼也
沒獲得，但另一個在你F1班級的同學或許就是最「成功」的人。上帝是不是很不公平？在
鏡頭前，我為此困惑到落淚，那是八年前我在捷克接受訪問的時候。記得抵達捷克之前，
我在曼谷街頭目睹一群人追著一名小偷。那可憐的小偷半裸，像我一樣瘦(嗯 沒錯)，為
了逃避司法制裁，他爬上一棟老舊的建築。或許，他是為了買東西吃才偷走30元。這一幕
，讓我非常震驚；一個小時前，我還在彈奏鋼琴，我從來不知道這個世界有這麼多的悲劇
、不公平和悲傷。我根本無法明白。
經過多年的內在衝突，我領悟到我們是誰並不重要，重要的是：我們是什麼。或許那個可
憐的傢伙註定要偷那30元。我註定被同一個人拋棄3次；莫札特註定是有史以來最偉大的
奇才。但在這些混亂之外，我仍然相信公平。我深信在這世上無窮變化底下，上帝並不會
輕易地以我們是否「外顯」地「將我們的信仰投注在上帝」或做「對」的事情而評斷我們
。但我相信祂會看著我們如何出於真誠地成長，且誠實地面對自己身為一個人。
我不相信天堂。因為我相信我們已經生活在天堂裡。我們只是被我們不成熟的天性給蒙蔽
，太愚蠢才去承認吧。
希望那些看過KJ的人會喜歡它。你們很幸運，因為連我自己都還沒看過。
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※ 編輯: j2059731702 來自: 163.18.37.87 (01/10 13:15)