原來看到這個系列的笑話是中文版的 和ST沒關係 (載於最後)...
沒想到竟然看到ST版的 原來這是個國際性接龍笑話 真是有趣... :)
Why did the chicken cross the road?
[Star Trek: The Original Series version]
Kirk: You chicken bastard, you killed my son...YOU chicken BASTARD,
you killed...my SON...you CHICKEN bastard....you killed my...son!
Spock: Fascinating, Captain.
Bones: Dammit, I'm a doctor, not an ornithologist!
Scotty: Because she couldna take much morrrrrre.
Uhura: Shall I open hailing frequencies so you can ask it, sir?
Sulu: Don't call me Tiny!
Chekov: It must have been on its way to assist in saving my life for
the billionth time..did I scream this time?
Nurse Chapel: Oh, Spock!
Charlie X: Because it didn't want to STAY...STAY...STAY...
Harvey Mudd: Chicken? I don't remember any chicken. No no no,
there's been a terrible misunderstanding.
Sarek: Sometimes logic fails me where chickens are concerned.
Khan: With my last breath I spit at the chicken...
V'Ger: To join with the Creator.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
[Star Trek: The Next Generation version]
Picard: There are four lights!
Riker: I don't know why, but I know how: with pleasure, sir.
Troi: I feel the chicken's pain!
Data: The chicken, in observing that it was on the opposite side
of the 20th century Terran paved roadway, was aware that its
immediate goal should have been to traverse the distance without
interception by an kind of combustion-propelled personal transport
vehicle, but I am unclear as to why any kind of domesticated fowl
should desire to perambulate upon a conveyance normally reserved
for the usage of...yes, sir.
Geordi: Well, wherever it's going, I'm sure it'll have more luck with
women than I do.
Worf: KLINGON chickens do NOT cross roads.
Dr. Crusher: If there's nothing wrong with the chicken, there must be
something wrong with the universe.
Tasha: That depends...was it fully functional?
Wesley: I'm not sure, but I can figure it out if I reroute these
systems and reconfigure the warp field and run a complete
internal whootchacallit on the computers and...
Lwaxana: Oh, Jean-Luc!
Mr. Homn:
Q: Wouldn't you like to know? Too bad your puny human brain wouldn't
be able to comprehend the answer.
Dr. Soran: His heart just wasn't in it. (Scenes of chicken torture
with nanoprobes have been edited out.)
Hugh the Borg: Maybe it just needed a big hug!
The Borg: Crossing the road is irrelevant.
The chicken will be assimilated.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
[Star Trek: Deep Space Nine version]
Sisko: It was seeking deeper meaning. Jake, do you see what we've
learned from all this?
Dax: To get to the other side. Kurzon might have disagreed with me,
Tobin I'm sure wouldn't have had a clue, and then there's...
Kira: It was probably being chased by those cursed Cardassians.
Dr. Bashir: It probably heard about my amazing medical skills not to
mention my sexual prowess and came to get some pointers.
O'Brien: No problem, Commander, I'll get right on it.
Odo: I don't know, but I'm sure it must be Quark's fault.
Quark: Who, me?
Jake: Check out the babe that just came off that transport!
The Grand Nagus: Stupid chicken! You don't cross the road all at
once! You sneak across it quietly, without anyone noticing!
Gul Dukat: Well, that's a very interesting question...I'm sure we
can work out some kind of arrangement to obtain that
information that will be to everyone's satisfaction.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
[Star Trek: Voyager version]
Janeway: Its primary goal was no doubt to get back to the Alpha
Quadrant...and it probably misses its dog.
Chakotay: Whatever its reason, whatever its goals, we should respect
its right to cross the road and seek its own spiritual awareness.
Tuvok: That's not a question we'd prefer to hear from a senior officer.
It makes the junior officers nervous.
Paris: Well, I think that...say, that's a lovely shirt you're wearing.
Harry: I don't know, it's my first mission.
B'Elanna: I'm sure it felt suffocated by all the bleeping regulations
of bleeping Starfleet and just couldn't stand it any longer!
Neelix: Actually, Captain, I'm not really familiar with the chickens
in this system. But, if you can catch it, I can cook it.
Kes: It was remembering back to the times when its ancestors crossed
roads all the time! They lost those abilities because they
stopped using them!
HoloDoc: How should I know? No one tells me anything around here.
I didn't even know we added chickens to the crew.
All I know is that it would have been nice, BEFORE the
chicken went off to the cross the road, if it had
remembered to turn me off!
=附錄=
標題: 公雞為什麼過馬路
亞理斯多德﹕公雞有過馬路的本性。
女性主義者﹕為什麼只管問公雞過馬路的事，難道母雞就不是雞？為什麼
沒有人問，「為什麼母雞過馬路？」
馬克思﹕這是歷史辯證的必然後果。
中國﹕我們視這種舉動為一種富挑逗性的行為，我們警告，目前中國的
軍事配備有能力隨時發動一場進攻，鎮壓這種顛覆性的活動。
經驗主義者﹕你親眼看見牠過馬路了嗎？如果你親眼看見了，為什麼還要
懷疑呢？
黑人領袖二﹕馬路象徵黑人，公雞象徵高傲的白人，每一天都有公雞殘踏著
馬路，霸道的越過去，我們要馬上阻止這種不正義的行為。
瑪基亞維利﹕不管公雞過馬路的動機是什麼，重要的是牠達到了目的，目的
能夠顯示手段的正確。
愛因斯坦﹕公雞真的過馬路嗎？你們是否考慮到，也許是牠腳下的馬路在移動？
比爾．蓋茲﹕公雞98過馬路的姿勢還不錯吧！但請大家注意，我們即將推出
公雞2000，牠不但會過馬路，還會生蛋，這將是前所未有的創舉，價格只是
稍為增加一點點。
江澤民：公雞過馬路是我國內政問題，中國所有愛國的人民絕不允許外國勢力的干涉，
把這個事件當作是一各笑話，貼在國際網際網路上！
這種帝國主義的勾當是絕對不會成功，絕對不會有好的下場！
我們不排除以武力來解決這個公雞問題的可能！
李登輝:這個公雞啊這個是,過馬路啊這個是沒有那麼嚴重的這事情啊，
不要太在意嘛這個是....
陳水扁:我相信，公雞一定會走新中間路線
宋主席：公雞過馬路是體現了全省走透透的精神
大家應該學習公雞一樣的親民
顏清標：因為媽祖要回娘家
龍應台：過馬路是公雞成年禮很重要的一部分
搞文化活動的人 隨便問公雞過馬路的原因是很不禮貌的
李敖： 這個簡直胡說八道！ 根據我這個剪報的照片，過馬路的是小雞！
你看！ 這照片上的雞，雞雞這麼一點點，怎麼會是公雞？！，
許榮棋： 李敖是騙子！他明明在X月X日說過：「公雞過馬路」！
呂秀蓮：「公雞過馬路」是父權社會的產物，應改為「白面公雞與黑面母雞過馬路」
陳定南：公雞過不過馬路 不是調查局的職掌範圍....
柏拉圖: 為了追求更高的善
亞里斯多德: 為了發揮潛能
愛因斯坦: 究竟是雞過馬路, 還是馬路過雞, 取決於你的參考座標
佛祖: 你會提出這樣的問題, 表示你否定自己的雞性
歌德: 為了諄照永恆的雞定律
海明威: 為了死, 在大雨中
馬克思: 歷史的必然性
尼采: 若你儗視著路的另一端, 路也要開始儗視你了
愛墨生: 他並非穿過馬路, 而是超越了他 (美國十九世紀作家, 超越主義者)
海森保: 我們不確定雞在馬路的哪一邊, 但雞的確是到的很快
(測不準原理的提出者)
孔子: 未知人, 焉知雞
莊子: 那隻雞好快樂阿!
惠子: 你不是那隻雞, 怎麼知道那隻雞為什麼要過馬路
公孫龍: 過馬路的雞不是雞
孫子: 這隻雞有勇無謀, 不宜為將
祖荻: 我該起舞了
--
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