[少年] 混在一起吐

作者fatedice (賭運女神我愛妳)

看板Suckcomic

標題[少年] 混在一起吐

時間Sat Apr 18 21:00:22 2009

「各位觀眾好，我是主播眼鏡八。雖然在中場休息時間介紹選手算遲了一點，不過我們還是來聽聽評審對於兩位參賽者的看法。」「我說新八啊，幹嘛接這麼麻煩的工作啊？你隨便講講吧。」「你還敢說勒。」新八刻意壓住麥克風說著：「還不是因為你在長篇打鬥不夠水準，這次才被編輯部的人調來這裡參觀一流的高手是如何戰鬥的！早知道就該跟仙人學學必殺技的…」「這次主辦單位只提供那麼大坨的美奶滋是怎樣？沒有糖份讓我覺得好想睡，剩下的就交給你吐槽了。」自然捲說完就睡，完全不理會接下來的狀況。「阿…，那麼讓我們先來看看紅色角落的挑戰者。「靠著久保教練運用大量的潑墨策略，草莓選手在前一節的比賽成功地犧牲4號祭品，取得致敬的機會，在現在的休息時間正努力的背台詞，對於取得這屆漫吐盃寶座似乎是勢在必得啊！讓我們來訪問一下同隊的織姬同學有什麼看法。」「黑崎同學黑崎同學黑崎同學黑崎同學黑崎同學黑崎同學.....」童言巨乳的織姬除了不停上下左右晃動，還有重複不知所云的話語外，毫無其他反應。「冷靜點新八（ㄔㄨˋ ㄋㄢˊ），瞧你滿頭大汗的。」「阿銀你也是啊，鼻血流不停！」「那是鼻涕好嗎。巧克力吃太多會比較濃，顏色比較深。」「讓我們接著看看另一邊的參賽者，這隊的岸本教練教練也非常厲害！從初賽到現在，不斷使用老到不行的老梗戰術，讓名人選手順利將熱血指數爆表，目前的身世、憤怒、和有的沒有的都呈現爆表狀態！」「沒錯，連前次衛冕的腦殘招式這次也更加進化了，跟我們真的不能比啊，新八。」「依你的看法，現在抬老爸、師傅當祭品，有可能比得過草莓選手的致敬招式嗎？」「很難說唷。」阿銀一邊翻著JUMP，「雖然草莓選手決定要斷手斷腳，不過模仿的四不像。另一方面，名人選手招式太過老套，可能有極大的弱點，兩方都有不利因素存在。」「讓我們來聽聽同隊的雛田女士有什麼看法。」「太好了，名人君。」童言巨乳的雛田除了不停上下左右晃動，還有重複不知所云的話語外，毫無其他反應。「兩方選手看來是勢均力敵呢！」（新八鼻血ing）「恩，戰鬥值非常驚人！」（阿銀鼻血ing）「再過幾秒鐘就要展開下一節的比賽了，兩方選手似乎都已經做好了準備，驚天動地的比賽即將開始！」吐槽八有跟沒有一樣的報導成功的炒熱在場觀眾的情緒，今年漫吐盃的冠軍賽即將邁入最高潮！唯獨一個人冷冷地看著比賽，他的帽沿壓的很低很低，似乎不想透露出身份。「太嫩了！」他輕輕的說著。沒想到這句挑釁立刻引來全場注目，每位觀眾的眼神中透露出不滿和憤怒。連場上準備交手的兩位選手這時也都停止動作。論水準，今年漫吐冠軍有誰能跟死神、火影相比？似乎察覺到什麼，下一刻的他竟然將手中的網球放入嘴中啃了起來！如此獵奇的舉動差點沒讓全場觀眾嚇出尿來。「我的天啊，有位看似白目的國中生嗆聲之後，竟然將網球吃下去了！」「冷靜點新八，那傢伙手上拿的是奇異果。」在阿銀說完，大家才看清楚了原來那只是把一顆奇異果弄成網球造型。「你們還有得學呢！」號稱打敗賽啞人的驕傲，史上最強的國中生龍馬將咬了一口的奇異果往上一拋，隨即揮出強烈的一拍！「他出招了！」阿銀訝異的說著。那一刻，久保呆掉了究竟有心到底有沒有用？岸本也呆掉了究竟老梗的血統與和平到底有沒有用？只有斐許笑了，笑的人心寒...。「究竟，網球王子的歸來會為此次漫吐盃帶來怎樣的變動？」新八拼死報導著。 -- ※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc) ◆ From: 123.192.99.150

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