Bigger Fish to Fry
I said a bad word when I was a kid
Mamma said that I'd be sorry for the sin that I did
My daddy whooped me and the preacher said shame
And I tried like hell to change.
But I cuss, I smoke
I laugh at dirty jokes
The minor vices, man I know 'em well
I've closed down bars
I've lusted in my heart
My exes think I oughta burn in hell
But the devil he won't notice when I die
Don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry
Politicians taking pork barrel bribes
Crooked CEOs are getting off with no time
Christmas Eve burglars stealing good children's toys
(Can't say Christmas)
Holiday burglars stealing good children's toys.
(Chorus)
I cuss, I smoke
I laugh at dirty jokes
The minor vices
Man I know 'em well
I've closed down bars
I've lusted in my heart
My ex thinks that I ought to burn in hell
But the devil won't even notice when I die
Yeah don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry
Yeah there's gonna be bonfire burning
An everlasting barbecue
But with all the bad stuff going on
There ain't gonna be room for me and you
'Cause we cuss, we smoke
We laugh at Tater's jokes
Tell one Jim
You know you're old when your wife says
Honey let's run upstairs and make love
And your answer is "I cannot do both."
The minor vices, man we know 'em well
We've closed down bars
We've lusted in our hearts
Our exes think we oughta burn in hell
But the devil he won't notice when we die
Yeah don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry
Yeah don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry
Pass the tartar sauce
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