推 isaac0204:"My Precious"比較經典 XDDDDDD 01/08 17:24
clerks 2
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( register beeping )
"One ring to rule them all."
( register beeping )
"One ring to find them."
Oh, Jesus.
"One ring to bring them all."
"And in the darkness bind them."
Yes! Dude!
How many times?
Well, um, three for Fellowship,
two for Towers,four for Return.
Five for Return.
Dude!
All right, look,
there's only oneReturn, okay,and it ain't of the king--it's of the Jedi.
Oh, Star Wars geek.
Oh, I'm the geek?
Look at you two,whipping out your preciouses.
You'll have to excuse him.
He's not "down"with the trilogy.
Oh, what the fuck happened to this world?
There's only one trilogy,
you fucking morons.
You know what?
Maybe we should start calling your friend Padme,
because he loves Mannequin Skywalker
so much, right?
robotic monotone"Danger, danger.
"My name is Anakin.
My shitty acting is ruining saga."
chuckles Yeah.
Yeah, you're crazy, Jar-Jar.
Oh, I'm crazy?
Those fucking hobbit movies were boring as hell.
All it was was a bunch of people walking.
Three movies of people walking to a fuckin' volcano.
Here's the first movie.
And here's the second movie.
He is way off. Loser.
You ready for the third movie?
( sighs )
Fuckin' A.
Even the fuckin' trees walked in those movies.
You know what?
I've had enough of you.
Your simplistic analysis of the trilogy aside,
The Lord of the Rings was a massive achievement that
even the Academy recognized
when they gave Peter Jackson the Best Directing Oscar--
an award your little friend George "Toy Boy" Lucas has never
and will never win.
Bones.
Oh, sick burn.
Let me tell you something.
If Peter Jackson really wanted to blow me away
with those "Rings" movies, he would've ended the third one
on the logical closure point,
not the 25 endings that followed.
What's the logical closure point?
Yeah, friend,
enlighten us.
When fucking Frito wakes up from his little coma or whatever,
and the little hobbits are jumping up and down on his bed,
and Sam leans in the doorway
and gives him that very fuckin' gay look.
ELIAS: Not the Rings, Randal.
Say what you will about Jesus,
but leave the Rings out of this.
I am gonna kick your ass back to the Shire
if you don't shut your fuckin' mouth.
That look was so gay,I thought Sam was gonna tell
the little hobbits to take a walk
so he could saunter over to Frodo
and suck his fuckin' cock.
Now, that would've been an Academy Award-worthy ending.
Hey, faggot, they're not gay.They're hobbits.
And then right after the Sam-Frodo suckfest,
right before the credits roll,
Sam fucking flat-out bricks in Frodo's mouth.
I swear...
Fuck you!
--
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