→ Straw14: 我翻譯這篇有人要賞我批幣ㄇ 09/27 22:55
→ Straw14: 先說 我可是南部第一學府鳳新高等資優生 09/27 22:56
推 fivemoonsky8: 回樓上，我大YA的！ 09/27 23:00
噓 danny006637: 我都看得懂欸 09/27 23:03
噓 DodiFed: 所以大家知道p幣富翁是怎麼來的齁 joke真好洗 : ) 09/27 23:13
→ waxigu: 看不懂啦 09/28 01:33
Brother Love
Teacher: Cassandra, if I saw a man beating a donkey and I stopped
him, what virtue would I be demonstrasting?
Cassandra: Brother love?
---
Like father, like son
Son: Papa, what's the meaning of "Like father, like son?"
Father: Bastard. What another scandalous thing have you done
in the school?
---
the lowest grade
"Professor, I did the best I could on this shit. I really don't
think I deserve a zero."
"Neither do I. But that's the lowest grade I'm allow to give."
---
Chief is at the wedding
A police stopped a motorist who was speeding on the street.
"But officer," the man said, "I can explain."
"Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to put you
in kail until the chief gets back."
"But, officer, I......"
"I said to keep quiet! You are going to jail!"
A few hours later, the officer looked in on his prisoner and said,
"You are lucky because the chief is at his daughter's wedding.
He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."
"Are you sure?" answered the man in the cell.
"I am the groom."
---
The Same Action Yields the Same Result
A couple of hunters chartered a small plane to fly them to a
forest, and made an appointment with the pilot to come back
and fetch them in about two weeks. At the end of the two weeks,
they had shot a lot of animals that they wanted to load onto the
plane.
But the pilot said, "This plane won't be able to take more than
one wild buffalo. You'll have to leave the other behind."
Then the hunters protested, saying, "But last year, another pilot
with the same airplane let us take two buffalos and some otherr
animals in the plane as well."
So the new pilot thought about it. He was a little bit skeptical,
but finally he said, "OK, since you did it last year, I guess this
year we can do it again."
Then he loaded the two buffalos and a few other animals in, and
the plane took off. Five minutes later, it crashed in a neighboring
area.
The three men climbed out and lokked around, and one hunter said
to the other, "Where do you think we are now?"
The second one surveyed the area and said, "I think we're about
one mile to the left of the place we crashed last year."
---
Grnadpa will pay the bill
Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, the pretty
girl said, "I would like to buy this material for a new dress.
How much does it cost?"
"Only one kiss per yard," replied the male clerk with a smirk.
"That's fine," said the girl. "I'll take ten yards."
With expectation and anticipation written all over his face,
the clerk quickly measured out the cloth, wrapped it up, then
teasingly held it out.
The girl snapped up the package, pointed to the old geezer standing
beside her, and smiled, "Grandpa will pay the bill."
---
Always Share
An old couple went into a restaurant and ordered something to eat:
one Coca Cola and one portion of french fries. The old man sat
down and the woman, his wife, sat opposite him, and he began to
divide the Coca Cola into two glasses, half for him and half for
his wife.
He divided all the french fries half-and-half. He gave half to his
wife and kept half for hemself. Then he began to eat and drink,
and the woman just drank but didn't eat.
There was a young man who was standing next to the table and wondering
why the old man had divided everything in half, and he thought that
maybe they did't have any money. He said to the old couple,
"Okay, I can buy you one more portion; you don't have to share like that."
So the old man explained, "No, no, no, we have benn married for
forty years and we always share everything. Whatever we have, we share
half and half. Don't worry, but thank you, anyow."
But then after a while, he saw that the woman wasn't eating, and he
asked, "Why aren't you eating?" And the wife said, "Today is his turn
to use the teeth."
--
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